Page 15 of Big Balls
Oh crap. Katy. His daughter is right here. I pull away, even though every single cell of my body screams in protest at quitting the best kiss I’ve ever had.
I know there’s some way to force air back into my lungs and continue living, but Ethan Alexander just kissed me, and all the rules that governed my existence have changed in the last minute or two.
As his daughter cheers and throws confetti at us—I’m impressed that she has this ready at a moment’s notice—I pull away from him, frantic not to let my feelings show.
“Yay,” I cheer weakly, earning a smile from Katy.
But when my gaze finds Ethan, he’s giving me another of those fierce glares, like he wants to stab right through me with his eyes and leave me to bleed out on the floor.
I can’t seem to fully control the way I’m wringing my hands, so I shove them behind me.
“Well, I’d better go for now. Take whatever time you need to think everything over, and I’ll see you later, I guess. Or not. Your choice. Obviously. So, um, good luck.” I’m babbling again, but that’s better than the part where I forgot how to breathe all because of one kiss. A very PG, kid-staring-at-us, closed-mouth kiss. A kiss that knocked the air from my lungs and made the entire Earth shift on its axis.
Katy throws her arms around me again, squeezing hard. “Come back again tomorrow. We can play wedding again.”
I’m already shaking my head. “Barbies. Next time, we’re playing Barbies, okay?”
And then I grab my purse and get out as fast as I can, before I do something even more stupid than that one time I kissed Ethan Alexander.
How is this even my real life?
5
Ethan
I haveno idea what the hell happened. It was supposed to be a game, and I’m really fucking good at games. But when Zoe melted against my mouth and then let out that little moan, it didn’t feel like we were pretending.
I’m trying not to think about it, though.
I’m trying not to think about the way she smelled, the way she felt in my arms, the way I keep thinking about what I’d have to do or say in order to taste her all over again.
I’m trying not to think about the way she didn’t think to ask me if I wanted to kiss her.
I’m trying not to think about the way she kissed me back.
“You’re it,” Katy announces from the backseat, oblivious to the way my world is falling apart.
“What?” I ask her.
“Daddy. You’re it.”
“Oh yeah?” I turn to make eye contact with my daughter, because I know what she’s doing. She can tell my mind is somewhere else, and she wants me to give her all of my attention. “Maybe I don’t feel like beingittoday.”
Katy bats her pretty little eyelashes at me. “But Daddy, you always feel like you’re it. Unless Auntie Zoe is it.”
My pulse races treacherously at the mention of her name. Zoe’s been taking care of my precious Katydid for an entire week during my practices, so that we can all get used to having Zoe around our place. But I’m going to have to sit her down and have a talk with her. Make it clear that there’s no way anything kissing-related can happen between us, no matter what happened earlier.
It’s more important than ever that we stick to our new routine.
The one where Zoe is in my house taking care of my little girl and I definitely don’t spend every spare moment thinking about her mouth. Or how many wicked things I’d like to do to her.
Fucking Sebastian. This entire situation is his fault. I should definitely pick a fight with him the next time we’re together. He more than deserves it.
He could have hired any one of a thousand stuffy, mothball-scented spinsters, but instead he chose Zoe.
Zoe, who planted an entire garden with my daughter so they could have more butterflies in the backyard. Zoe, who does great voices whenever she reads a book out loud, especially her monster voice. Zoe, whose entire life seems to consist of finding things to smile about and then dragging my sweet Katy along for the ride.
I’ve never seen my little girl so happy. And she’s doing all these things I never thought were in the cards for her. Zoe bought her a pair of noise-canceling headphones with cute little pink cat ears on top. And then the two of them went to Cafe du Monde for beignets and a fancy coffee.
