Page 14 of Big Balls
“What’s wrong, Auntie Zoe?” Katy stares at me, and for the millionth time I curse myself for blushing and being awkward and weird, but this is how I am, and I can’t help it.
“Nothing,” I squeak out. “Everything’s fine.”
Ethan squeezes my hands. “Let’s keep going, Katydid.”
She nods. “As I was saying, we are gathered together for love. And it’s a wedding. And now Daddy’s going to kiss her because he loves her so much.”
We both turn to stare at the little tyrant, who is giving us a look of wide-eyed innocence. “What? Don’t people usually kiss at weddings?”
I manage to remember to breathe, and finally answer, “Well, we could pretend to kiss. That’s fine, isn't it?”
Katy’s eyes flash from me to her Daddy, then back to me. “No. I don’t like lying. Not at a wedding. Especially when I’m in charge.”
I laugh nervously, a brittle, slightly hysterical sound. “Well, I’m sure your Daddy has other things to do. I have to head home soon, too. Let him think it over. About whether I can come play with you again.”
Katy’s eyes slide back to her daddy. “You didn’t tell her.”
What didn’t he tell me? A quick burst of adrenaline leaves a metallic taste in my mouth. Is he having me arrested? Turning me into a missing persons case? My mind is spinning, and I can’t begin to guess.
Ethan Alexander pulls on my hands until we’re close enough for me to feel the heat coming off his body. “You’re it, Zoe. You’re the one to take care of my sweet Katy.”
I lick my lips, still jittery, convinced that somehow I’m missing out on what’s really going on here. And it’s probably only my imagination, but I swear his eyes follow the movement of my tongue for a split-second at least.
He clears his throat. “That’s enough for today, Katy. Let’s let Miss Zoe head home.”
“Nope,” she says, popping the p in the word like a piece of bubblegum.
“Katy? What is it?” I still have the feeling that I’m missing something here, some piece of the puzzle I can’t figure out.
The little girl looks at me, then her daddy. “It’s time to kiss. Then you’ll be married.”
I force a smile onto my face. “Oh no, that’s okay.”
The man across from me raises one eyebrow, a singular act of sarcasm that I aspire to achieve on my own one day. “What’s the matter, Zoe? You chicken?”
Why yes, yes I am. I’m definitely not stupid enough to think that someone like Ethan Alexander is as overcome with anticipation and nerves as I am right now.
“That’s not it,” I lie. I’m so chicken that I’m going to sprout feathers and a beak any minute now.
“No lies at the wedding,” he says, and pulls me close to him, leaning forward at an impossibly slow rate.
I can’t control my breathing at all. Ethan freaking Big Balls Alexander is moving his face toward my face, and apparently we’re about to kiss.
And I know it’s all just pretend, a game we’re playing for his daughter’s amusement, but there’s still a thrill to it. I still get to touch him, and for a moment at least, I’m willing to pretend that maybe it isn’t all make believe.
“Okay,” I manage to say between sharp, panting breaths. “Okay, let’s do this.”
I wet my lips again, wishing that I were more confident. That I could somehow pull this off without us bonking noses or drooling on Ethan freaking Alexander.
Then his large hand lifts up the curtain of my hair, caressing my neck. Involuntarily my lips part, because the gesture is so tender, so unexpectedly romantic, there’s no way I can resist leaning into his touch.
I’m sure he feels my heart racing as he positions me where he wants me. With his hand along the column of my neck, caressing my skin, there’s no way he could miss the frantic thrumming of my pulse.
I know that his lips on mine are going to wreck me, but I can’t stop myself from leaning toward him any more than I could stop the movement of the earth along its axis. I lick my lips, ready to sink into this one stolen moment and enjoy the real life version of a dream come true.
His mouth finds mine, and all I can think about is how inexplicably soft his lips are. This man, whose entire body seems chiseled and hard and fierce, has the softest, sweetest mouth I could have imagined. I melt into him, a small moan rising in my throat.
For a moment, the entire world stops, and then starts spinning frantically to the sound of The White Stripes’s “Seven Nation Army,” another football stadium classic. I’m definitely sensing a recurring theme for Katy’s music choices.
