Page 18 of Empowered
“Please.”
“Don’t use his genetic material. Don’t inflict that on some poor woman out there, no matter how much money you give her for the dubious honor.”
“I figured everyone would say that. Damon turned out fine, I suppose, but who knows? I think it’s best if Damon agrees to father the child and let me legally adopt it.”
Sarah didn’t think she could be taken aback any more, yet here she was, raising her eyebrows at that suggestion. “He’s not going to like that.”
“No kidding. Neither will that wife of his, what with all their talk of raising an empire.” Natsuko rolled her eyes. “I’d appreciate it if you gently broached the subject with him before I do. I’m sure he’ll tell me no, but it’s his problem to fix since his father managed to get that clause in there. This marriage arrangement is no good to my family if I’m not guaranteed the inheritance I’m due for dealing with him.” Natsuko shuddered. “He may not be able to talk, but thoseeyes…he hates me. Hates that I won’t change my clothes in front of him, hates that I have a boyfriend while being engaged to him, hates…”
“That you’re not white?”
Natsuko laughed, her breathless airs both surprised and satisfied with Sarah’s response. “He’s a eugenic, isn’t he? I’ve seen some of his journals.”
“Yes. I’m sure you heard what happened to the second son he had with his ex-wife.”
“Hm. Yes.” Natsuko briefly glanced at Sarah before gazing out the window again. “I’ve heard a few things about his potential offspring.”
Sarah quickly left after that.She knows?Who else knew?
She still wasn’t over it when she returned to the office an hour later.
The floor was quiet, as usual for three in the afternoon. Most of the staff were either out running last minute errands before the weekend commenced, or they were pounding away at their keyboards for the same insufferable reason. Usually Sarah found comfort in it. Anything she could finish that afternoon meant less for her to do over the weekend. Also assuming she wasn’t working overtime at any of her boss’s numerous events and meetings.
She missed having Nigel by her side.
Any solace she used to feel was gone now. Sarah couldn’t come back from the Estate and not want to smash her face through her computer monitor.
So after she dumped the reports on her boss’s desk, she went straight to the employee bathroom, where she could hyperventilate in peace.
Remember how he used to touch you? Like you should be so grateful that anyone wanted you. You knew he didn’t really want you. You knew he was using you because he could, because you let him. Remember how he made you feel so happy and secure after you got pregnant? Remember when you were stupid enough to toast to your baby together? Remember waking up wanting to die?
Remember the hospital?
Remember the ultrasound that said your baby wasn’t there anymore?
Remember all the blood?
Remember the endless days in your mother’s house, wanting to die?
Remember wanting to die?
Sarah splashed cold water on her face and tried not to cry. No point in crying when she had work to do. Work was good. It distracted her from the hell she lived in.
“I know you’re at work right now,”she texted her brother.“But I need you.”She couldn’t believe it. She needed the man willing to cause pain to other women?
Forhersafety?
Even though Nigel was at work, he was quick to respond. Did he simply know when his sister contacted him when stressed out of her mind?
“I love you.”
Sarah had to put her phone away before she started crying.If I cry, he’ll cry.Wouldn’t be the first time that happened when they were on opposite ends of the earth, let alone the city.
Too late.
The first sob was the hardest, of course.
No, no, no! It wasn’t Sunday. What was she doing? She needed to bottle this up until it was appropriate to let it go.
