Page 60 of Willing to Wed the Rancher
Yes, the two had been wrong in how they’d gone about things. Eric should have come to him and told him before pursuing her. Luisa should have put an end to one relationship before starting another.
But it was past time for him to acknowledge their relationship itself hadn’t been wrong. Perhaps the two had even been perfect for each other. If Eric had felt for Luisa even a fraction of what he felt for Clarabelle, then they probably had been meant to be together.
“I’m sorry, Eric.” He whispered the words. It was also past time for him to ask Eric to forgive him.
The children were looking up at him, likely wondering what he was apologizing for. Maybe someday he’d be able to tell them all that had happened. Or maybe it was best if that part of the past was left behind here in America. The tragedy, the heartache, the scandal could forever be buried with Eric and Luisa and wouldn’t need to taint the children’s memory of their parents.
He just prayed that Eric could somehow hear his plea for forgiveness.
Regardless, Franz had to do as Clarabelle had suggested. He had to ask God to forgive him, and he had to finally forgive himself. Now that he’d come to the end of his journey in Colorado and America, he couldn’t leave until he’d done so.
He lowered himself to one knee and bowed his head.
From the corner of his eyes, he could see the children following his example, and the sight of them on one knee with their heads bowed brought him fresh resolve to live with integrity.
He closed his eyes and prayed for forgiveness, a clean soul, and that he could be a worthy father figure to the children. Most of all he prayed that someday God would find a way to reunite him with the woman he loved.
22
Trying to find solace, Clarabelle brushed a hand across the velvety flank of the newest foal—one that was just two days old.
When Hazel had greeted Clarabelle warmly upon her arrival a short while ago, she’d taken one look at Clarabelle’s tear-streaked face, hugged her, and then told her she had just the thing to cheer her up.
The sight of the spindly-legged filly had indeed cheered Clarabelle... for a few minutes. But as soon as Hazel had gone off to check on another of the broodmares who was expecting, Clarabelle’s tears had started again.
The paddock attached to the mare barn contained several mare and foal pairs. They were all grazing peacefully in the bright morning sunshine.
If only she could have just a tiny bit of their peace for her soul. But since riding away from Franz and the children, her soul had felt like it was being tormented.
In her heart, she was convinced she’d done the right thing in leaving Franz so that she could protect her relationship with Clementine. Considering how hurt Clementine still was, Clarabelle could only imagine the damage that running off with Franz would have caused. Clementine probably wouldn’t have spoken to her ever again.
Clarabelle ran her hand over the filly’s crest and then her withers. The human touch was important at this early age, and normally Clarabelle loved helping with the task of taming the foals.
But today she kept glancing at the house, waiting for Clementine to come out and saddle up her horse to ride into town. Clarabelle wanted to try to talk again. Maybe it would help if she shared that Franz was leaving and that she’d turned down his offer to go with him.
Clarabelle shook her head. Clementine would probably accuse her of gloating.
And what about Franz and the children? They were likely already on their way to town, if not already on the stagecoach. The very thought of the miles that separated them sent a strange desperation careening through Clarabelle.
What was she doing letting them go away without her? What if she never saw them again?
More tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Oh, for heaven’s sake.” She’d cried more over Franz in the past day than she’d ever cried before in her entire life.
“Wanna tell me what’s going on?” came a man’s voice nearby.
Clarabelle startled and rubbed her sleeve across the wetness on her cheeks.
It was Maverick, and he was in the open barn door only a dozen paces away, leaning casually against the wooden frame, watching her, and obviously had been long before she’d realized he was there.
“I’m fine.” She forced cheerfulness into her voice. “A little tired this morning, that’s all.”
“That ain’t all, darlin’.” With his muscular arms folded across his rugged frame, Maverick didn’t move from his spot. “C’mon now. Tell me what’s wrong.”
She had no doubt Hazel had gone straight to Maverick and told him something was wrong with her. Now, as her big brother, he probably felt it was his duty to fix her problems like he usually did. But this was one problem he couldn’t fix.
“The big question is why you’re here this morning and not over at your own place.” Maverick’s sun-browned face was wreathed with concern lines. “Not that I don’t like seeing you here, but don’t the children need you there?”
