Page 86 of Calling on the Matchmaker
Was everything alright? Finola shook her head. How could anything be alright ever again when she’d fallen in love withRiley? How had it happened? When? And why hadn’t she noticed the feeling growing?
Maybe she had noticed it but had chosen to ignore it the way she did most of her feelings. But how could she disregard her feelings for Riley any longer? She couldn’t, not when with every passing second, it was pulsing through her with growing strength and urgency.
Urgency for what?
Her gaze flitted up the length of the building, to the adjacent school, then to the interior of the convent through the open door. The other nuns were still donning their cloaks and bonnets. And the Mother Superior was standing in the hallway with them, admonishing them to spread the love of God everywhere they went.
As much as she loved the Sisters, she couldn’t deny the truth. She loved Riley more, and she wanted to be with him. Aye, she wanted to be with him.
She released a long exhale as though she hadn’t been breathing or really living until that moment.
“Finola, child, just the person I was hoping to see.” The Mother Superior stepped outside onto the top of the stoop.
Finola bowed her head in respect to the revered leader. Had word already reached the Mother Superior of her da’s intention to speak with her? Finola’s chest burned again with a new resolution. She would need to return home and tell Da to wait to meet with the Mother Superior.
She needed to talk with Riley first. He might already have given up on her. After all, she’d relentlessly pushed him away. And their last parting had been so final.
She wouldn’t blame Riley if he’d decided she wasn’t worth the effort anymore. She’d been more than a little difficult. She could admit, she’d been impossible.
The Mother Superior offered her a rare smile. “I’m pleased to say that your father and I had an amicable meeting thismorning and that he’s given his blessing to you joining our family.”
At the news, the other Sisters came outside, smiling and chattering excitedly. As they rushed down the stairs to hug her, she couldn’t respond, the words lost inside a strangely dead and silent heart.
She was too late. After all these years of trying to convince her da to let her join the convent, he’d done it. He released her to live her life. She couldn’t go back to him now and tell him she needed more time. How could she? That wouldn’t be fair to him, and it wouldn’t be fair to these dear Sisters.
Finola hugged the Sisters in return and tried to muster a respectable amount of enthusiasm, even though she felt none. Maybe she’d finally gotten what she thought she’d wanted. But in the process, she’d lost the one thing that mattered most—her match with Riley.
29
Riley stood outside the Shanahan mansion and fidgeted with his cravat and tall collar. He lifted his top hat and smoothed back a wayward strand of hair. Then he tugged at the lapel of his coat.
He’d taken extra care with his grooming, just as he had the first night he’d come with Bellamy to the Shanahans to discuss the possible match with Finola. That had been a momentous occasion, and he’d been anxious.
But this morning was even more important. And every nerve in his body was letting him know it. He wanted—no needed—to be at his very best before speaking with Finola. During the ride into the city earlier and while he’d gotten ready, he’d rehearsed a dozen different scenarios and exactly what he intended to say.
Though his head still ached from the fall from the barn roof yesterday, he hadn’t let on with his family. If he’d shown the least bit of pain, Eleanor and Lorette and the other girls would have forced him back to bed and made him rest the entire day. After the women had clung to him and doted on him over breakfast, his dad had finally been the one to encourage the womenfolk to let him go.
With midmorning already upon him, he’d wasted enough time. He’d heard James Shanahan was in the city for a few days, had likely come when he’d gotten the letter canceling the match. And now when he saw Riley, he would probably greet him with a fist to his nose.
Shanahan had been counting on him to win over Finola, had believed he’d succeed where every other man had failed. And Riley had let him down.
Riley lifted a fist to the door and hesitated again. Today he intended to rectify that. He’d let Shanahan and Finola both know he would wait as long as it took for Finola to care about him in return.
She might not punch him in the nose, but she’d think nothing of slapping him in the face. In fact, he missed her so much that a slap from her was preferrable to nothing at all.
After clearing his throat, he rapped against the door, then took a step back, clasped his hands together, and waited.
Brisk footsteps echoed on the tile of the entryway inside, and as the door rattled and began to open, Riley arched his neck, then forced himself not to fidget and to present himself as a gentleman and not a rogue. He could do so once in a while.
The butler answered the door. Attired as usual in an immaculate black suit, not a strand of his silver hair was out of place. Rather than the welcoming nod, Winston remained overly stiff and formal. And silent. Without a word of greeting.
Riley supposed the aloofness was the butler’s signal of displeasure for Riley calling off the match. He stifled his frustration and forced out his request. “May I please speak with Finola?”
Winston started to close the door. “Miss Shanahan isn’t home this morning.”
Riley shot out a hand to keep the servant from slamming the door in his face. “When do you expect her to return?” Was she already out visiting among the immigrants? If so, she’d likely gone with the Sisters of Charity. He glanced down the street,not daring to hope that he’d get a glimpse of her riding away in the wagon, but hoping nonetheless.
The residential area was quiet, almost deserted for the February morning. He supposed more families were leaving the city if they could find a safer place to temporarily live. Not everyone had a country home like the Shanahans or relatives like he did. Many people would have no choice but to stay in the city and suffer as the cholera spread.
