Page 55 of Besotted
After nightfall, Aunt Elspeth, Aunt Idony, and Chester had left on the horses given to them by the steward, while I waited at the tunnel entrance for them to come after me. We’d ridden for hours, and from my study of geography as well as everything Chester had already told me, we still had several days of riding to the northeast before reaching Delsworth. We would rest at well-armed estates and hopefully gain additional forces before we made the last part of the journey up the coastal road into Delsworth.
Anticipation had built inside me, and I drew in a deep breath. My future spread out before me as rugged and uncertain as the heathland.
A future without Kresten.
At the thought of him, pain speared my chest. What would he think when he returned in a month to find nothing but the note I’d left behind? He’d be disappointed to discover I was gone.
I pressed a hand against my chest and felt the soft linen of the scarf he’d given me. I’d tied it under my tunic near my heart. Though I’d debated leaving it at the cottage with the note, in the end I hadn’t been able to let go of it. Perhaps I wouldn’t be able to have him, but I could cling to the memories—at least for now—couldn’t I?
Chester slowed our mount. “If you need to stop, we should do so now before we are out on the open heathland.”
“Very well.” I wasn’t accustomed to riding and was already saddle weary. “I should think Aunt Idony and Aunt Elspeth would appreciate a break as well.”
Chester reined the horse near a clump of sweetbriars and assisted me down. My legs refused to hold me, and I grabbed on to Chester to keep from falling. His cloak shifted to reveal a sheet of parchment sticking out of his inner pocket—a sheet exactly like the one I’d torn from the front of one of my books when I’d scrawled a note to Kresten.
Surely he hadn’t taken the note from the kitchen table where I’d placed it. I jerked the parchment free from his pocket. “What is this?” I couldn’t keep the accusation from my voice.
He attempted to wrest the paper from me, but I pressed it against my chest where he dare not reach.
“Did you take my letter to Kresten?” From the corner of my eye, I could see Aunt Idony hastily dismounting, likely sensing another feud brewing between Chester and me. Had she known Chester had taken my note? What if she’d conspired with him to sneak it away?
I took several more steps away from Chester, frustration rushing through me and crashing into the walls I’d constructed around my heart to keep myself from mourning too deeply for Kresten.
“You couldn’t leave a note like this on the table, Your Majesty,” he replied with too much calmness. “If the queen’s spies had happened upon it, they would have easily picked up our trail.”
“How dare you!” My heartache had no barriers to contain it, and it rose swiftly into my throat.
“’Twas for your safety.”
Arching her back, Aunt Idony wobbled over and stood next to Chester. Aunt Elspeth struggled to dismount, and when her feet finally touched the ground, she promptly sat down and released a loud groan.
The letter crumpled beneath my fingers. Now Kresten would never know what became of me. When he returned, he would be sick with worry and heartbroken. At the very thought of his turmoil came the sudden need to weep.
“Your Majesty,” Aunt Idony said. “Once you are safely settled at Delsworth, you’ll have plenty of opportunities to write and inform the young woodcutter of your whereabouts.”
“What if he returns before the month’s end?” The question tore from my throat, laced with all the agony I could no longer ignore. “He will be devastated.”
Chester released an exasperated sigh. “It makes no difference. He’ll be devastated note or not.”
Tears stung my eyes, the tears I’d wanted to shed at the loss of the man I loved but that I hadn’t allowed in our hasty departure and flight to Huntwell Fortress. Now several spilled over. I swiped at them, unwilling for anyone to see how deeply I would miss Kresten.
As more trickled down my cheeks, I spun and stalked away, needing a moment of privacy to grieve.
“Where are you going?” Chester called.
“Let her have a few minutes,” Aunt Idony said, likely with a restraining hand on his arm. “We can surely allow her that.”
“She can’t run off right now.”
“I need just a moment, Chester,” I called. “Please. After taking away the letter, you can spare me a moment, can you not?”
He mumbled something urgent to Aunt Idony that I didn’t hear as I pushed past the briars and into the covering of thick foliage. My footsteps crunched against the fallen leaves and brittle branches, and as the darkness enfolded me, a sob welled up.
“Elspeth will attend her,” Aunt Idony replied. “Won’t you?”
“Of course I will, dear heart.” A moment later, Aunt Elspeth grunted as she rose from the ground. I didn’t wait for her but plunged deeper into the brush, needing to hide my sorrow.
The tears fell faster the farther I went, until I stopped, knowing I couldn’t stray too far.
