Page 81 of Moth
“Wait.” He snatches my arm, steering me past the restaurant and into a nearby alley. From here, we have a decent view of the restaurant’s entrance, but we’re out of sight from those inside.
“This isn’t the time or the place to hop around, little bunny.” The words carry his trademark taunts, but his voice falls flat and lacks its usual flair. He sounds wary. I risk glancing at his face only to find his stare fixed on the nearby gathering—namely, the man commanding attention from the very heart of the commotion. “You’re going to draw attention,” he tells me, his jaw tense, a muscle twitching against the tan skin. “You have that face. Anyone could take one look and know you aren’t missing a damn thing—”
“I’m not here for you,” I say, my voice softer than I’d like. To bolster the statement, I step forward, searching for Mara, but I can’t resist one last quip. “But I’m surprised someone like you can cease being selfish long enough to look for someone else.”
“A search party isn’t a good time to be jealous, bunny,” he counters.
I feel my cheeks flush hot, but before I can sputter out a comeback, his grip tightens, pulling me deeper into the alley. With every step, my heartbeat quickens, and my palms sweat. Am I afraid?
Yes,I decide as my gaze flicks along his face. I’m terrified—but not of him.
“Get off.” My hand forms a fist before I can stop myself and lashes out. My knuckles smart, harmlessly glancing off his chest, but he grunts, caught off guard.
“I said, let go.” I try to tug my arm loose, but he doesn’t relent, steadily pulling me along. So I dig my heels into the pavement. “I can take a hint,” I snarl as loudly as I dare. “We’re done, aren’t we? Now you can go back to Bonnie, and I’ll—”
He releases me so suddenly that I trip, forced to brace my hand against the nearest wall for balance. But his heavy sigh stops me dead in my tracks. My feet refuse to move, forcing me to watch as he wavers, raking a hand through his hair, his mouth twisted into an expression that transforms him into a different person. Guilt?
I’m so used to suppressing and enduring. It seems as if he’s the only person in the world who stokes my worst instincts, breathing them to life.
Feeling.
Hating.
Spite.
“What you did wascruel,” I snarl, feeling my upper lip pull back from my teeth. “I don’t expect much from you, but I do at least expect respect.”
I don’t think it hits me until now, just how angry I truly am. The ache in my chest. The pathetic need to blink as my eyes burn with the threat of tears, but Bonnie’s image isn’t the one in my head, making my blood boil. It’s him, always him.
If he were truly an asshole, it would be so much easier.
Anything but this hot and cold. Fire and ice. Interest one moment and callous uncaring the next.
“And stringing me along isn’t cruel?” he counters. “Juggling fucking me between dinner dates with your boyfriend isn’t cruel?”
I bite my lip. I could come clean.
But I don’t.
“You don’t do relationships, remember? Besides, I’ve never gone out of my way to rub it in your face,” I croak, only to realize—as his eyes cut to me, flashing with rage—that I have in a sense. Why else would I bring Liam to his neighborhood, across from his place of work?
I’d wanted to see the look on his face, the same thing he’d taunted me with.
“Well, now we’re done,” I stammer, turning on my heel. “Feel free to bring your next fling by the bookshop whenever you—”
“Iwantedto hurt you.” He breathes the confession into the air in advance of his approach, giving me every chance to run away. When I don’t, his hands find my hips as his breath heats the back of my neck. “I’m glad I did,” he adds without an ounce of shame. “You were jealous. You feltused. Maybe now you’ll know what it feels like. To watch someone dangle what you can’t have in your fucking face. To have them toy with you. Pretend there’s more…”
My breathing feathers, my chest tight. “You’re the one who set the rules, remember?”
He laughs as if the answer is too obvious to even utter out loud. Instead, he spins me to face him, then lifts my chin until I meet his stare. “Search your soul the next time you write in that fucking journal. You set the pace yourself from the outset. A girl like you could never be interested in someone like me,remember?”
“And you’d rather play mind games than tell me the truth,” I say, startled by how well my voice matches his harsh tone. “Wasn’t it you who asked me to use my pretty words? Your turn. If youwantme to be interested in you, then just say so. Stop pretending you don’t care. If you want me, then don’t be a coward and punish me for it. Just say so!”
“It takes a while,” he murmurs, eyeing me with a skeptical tilt of his head. “But that bunny bite always comes out in the end. And this time? You didn’t even apologize.”
He lets me go and slips past me, exiting the alley. “If you say we’re done, we’re done,” he says. “But since you’re here, you might as well help.” He extends his arm toward me, and I make out a stack of flyers clenched in his fist.
Spurning him is my first impulse, but then my eyes fall over Faith’s smiling face. She must be my age or a little younger, and I can’t stop seeing her the night Branden and I had dinner where she worked. Even then…she looked terrified.
