Page 64 of The Highlander's Illicit Bride
If she was not there, Struan might have a chance at peace.
She hated that she was going to leave them in the middle of the night. But under the circumstances, it was the right thing to do.
Nonetheless, she didn’t want to leave without a single word of goodbye to Struan. He deserved some form of explanation for why she could not remain with him. He deserved to have some answers to the questions she knew would be running through his mind when he found her gone.
Isolde found her way to his study and quietly slipped inside. She knew he was elsewhere with Ewan, tending to clan business and was not likely to walk in on her. What she was doing was difficult enough. The last thing she needed was to be caught in the middle of it and then to then have to explain it to Struan to his face. That was something she was desperately trying to avoid.
Despite Struan telling her how strong he thought she was, Isolde felt like a coward. She could not bear to see the pain in his eyes when she told him she was leaving.
Isolde crossed to the massive desk and took a seat. With the sun slipping toward the horizon, the light was dim in the chamber, so she lit a candle to see by. It did little to dispel the shadows that clung to the room like cobwebs, but it would do. Isolde rifled through Struan’s drawers until she found a clean sheet ofparchment, quill, and inkpot. Her nerves were far from steady, but she picked up the quill and began to write…
Struan,
Before I say anythin’, I want ye tae ken how much I appreciate all ye’ve done fer me. Ye’ve protected me and kept me safe in me greatest time of need. Even when ye had nay reason tae, ye gave me yer word and ye held true tae it. Fer that, I’m grateful now and always will be.
I ken ye said I dinnae need tae apologize, but I will say it again anyway. I’m sorry fer nae tellin’ ye where Finlay was bein’ kept sooner. One thing I’ve learned in me time here is just how close ye and yer family are, which has made me feel even worse about it.
If ‘tis of any aid, in the woods behind the northern curtain wall of Cluny House, there’s an entrance tae a tunnel that will lead ye intae the keep. I learned about it while I was there. If ye use that tunnel, ye should be able get in and get Finlay out without bein’ detected.
I want ye tae ken I’m grateful fer ye lettin’ me stay here. I’d be lyin’ tae ye if I said there wasnae a big part of me that wanted tae stay forever, with ye. But me continued presence here puts ye and yer family in danger, and I cannae allow that. I ken ye’d argue the point with me, which is why I have tae leave this way.
I care for ye and I truly wish we had a life where we could be free tae be taegether. I wish we lived in a time and place whereye could choose tae be with me because ye want me rather than marry me out of some misguided notion that it’ll keep me safe from me faither.
All me love,
Isolde
Isolde sat with Ewan, Mairi, and Struan at the table in the family dining hall. The walls were covered in dark wood paneling and an oversized fireplace sat at the far end of the hall filling the room with a pleasant heat. Paintings of their forebears lined the walls along with weapons and Clan Cameron’s coat of arms. It was small and intimate. The way everybody was laughing and spoke warmly with one another made it feel downright cozy. They were obviously a family.
“Ye’ll have tae forgive me braither, he’s a little too proud of his body,” Mairi said with a laugh. “He preens around like a peacock, he daes, thinkin’ he’s been made in the shape of one of the Greek gods.”
Laughter rippled around the table. Struan had shared the story of their travels there and how embarrassed she’d been when he’d stripped down to bathe in the loch. Just the memory of it sent a flash of warmth into her cheeks.
Struan shrugged. “There’s naethin’ wrong with bein’ proud of me body.”
“Nay. There’s nothin’ wrong with it. But the rest of us dinnae need tae see it,” Mairi teased.
“’Tis true,” Ewan added. “Ye dae like tae run around half-naked as often as ye can.”
“I like the feel of the air on me skin.”
That set off another round of laughter and teasing. Isolde listened and she laughed along with them. She appreciated them trying to keep the mood light and the atmosphere fun. But her heart was far too heavy with the knowledge of what she would be doing, to truly feel it along with them.
The conversation was lively throughout their meal.
“All right, I’m goin’ tae bed,” Mairi said as she stood up some time later. “I thank ye all fer such a lovely evenin’. And I shall see ye all in the mornin’.”
Ewan soon followed her out, leaving Isolde alone with Struan. The sound of the fire crackling filled the otherwise silent hall, and its light glittered in his wild gray eyes as he looked at her over the rim of his cup as he drank. Isolde turned away, unable to meet his gaze.
“I should go tae bed,” she said.
Struan set his cup down and nodded. “Aye. I’ll walk ye back tae yer chamber.”
A small smile curled the corners of Isolde’s mouth. It was sweet and made her heart flutter. As the household staff bustled in and began clearing the table, Isolde got to her feet and led him out of the hall. They walked through the corridors in silence.
“Ye’ve been quiet tonight,” he said, clearly unwilling to let her go in silence.
“I’m… tired,” she replied.
