Page 69 of Sir Hugo Seeks a Wife
Hugo caught her upper arms to keep her near, even if she showed no sign of running away.“Don’t you understand, Athene?I’d be proud to call you my wife.”
She looked so weary, he felt like the worst bully.“But Yorkshire makes it all impossible.”
Baffled, he scowled at her.“What the bloody hell has Yorkshire got to do with it?”
Her long-suffering sigh didn’t make him any less displeased with her.He adored her, and he wanted to shake some sense into her.“Hugo, I told you – my family is prominent in the county.Very prominent.You can’t marry me without everyone knowing I’m the brainless little hussy who ran off with George Foster.”
He had a name for his rival at last.A name to conjure with in the north, to his regret.“I don’t give a rat’s arse.Hell, Athene, I’ve never met a woman so ready to lift her chin and consign any presumptuous bugger to perdition.By God, that’s what you did when we met.You’re brave enough to face down a bit of gossip.”
“Hugo, you’re a wonderful man.”The praise would mean more, if her expression wasn’t so disconsolate.“I’ll always appreciate the way you’ve treated me.”
“What?As someone worthy of respect?Don’t be a nitwit.You’re finer than anyone I know, finer by far than anyone who scorns you out of spite.”
“Thank you.”She looked ready to shatter.“But you’re a proud man.You won’t like the locals sniggering about my shady past and how you were fool enough to marry me.I won’t be invited anywhere respectable.I won’t be able to play my part in society as your wife.And what if we have children?”
“You say you’re barren,” he bit back, fighting to resist everything she said.Fighting against surrendering to the unyielding truths behind her words.
“I might be.You seem to doubt it.If I’m not, our sons and daughters will forever be tarred with their mother’s blighted name.Whispered about.Shunned.Treated as tainted.It will be bad enough for the boys.It will be worse for the girls.As they grow up, every self-righteous prig north of Wolverhampton will wait for our daughters to prove they’re just like their mother.It’s cruel to inflict that on any child.And all the time, mere miles away, my family will continue to refuse to acknowledge my existence.And the world will know.”
Hugo’s grip on her arms tightened and he stared into her eyes, willing her to relent.For the first time since he’d met her, he feared that he mightn’t prevail.That the combined weight of his beloved’s will and society’s disapproval might keep him from making a life with this one woman he wanted.“Athene, we can rise above it all.Youcan rise above it all, if you really want to.We’ll still have each other.We can be together, despite the world’s judgments.”
She settled a lightless gaze on him.The complete absence of hope made him furious and hideously afraid.“No, we can’t, Hugo.I can never be your wife.Don’t ask me again.”
Chapter 18
And now, my love, it’s time to part,
And now the worst of woe will start.
I’ll remember you until I die,
And speak your name upon a sigh.
Athene’s heart split, as she watched desolation seep into Hugo’s chiseled features.He looked like an old man.He released her and turned to stare into the fire, as if he could no longer bear to look at her.
How she loathed hurting him.She’d always dreaded damaging this exceptional man.But then he’d kissed her and begged her and turned her frenzied with lust, and she’d thought only of satisfying her wanton desires.She’d been so selfish.Now it was too late.
She flinched to recall the self-confident man she’d met.He’d struck her then as someone who was satisfied with his place in the world.He didn’t look like that now.He looked as if someone had carved out his heart with a rusty knife.
She’d done that to him.It made her wish that she’d never been born.
Her father had said that to her in the vile letter he’d sent to Vienna.Right now, she couldn’t help agreeing with him.
“I can’t give up.”Hugo’s voice was a low rumble of despair.
“You must.”
He lifted his head to regard her in agonized bewilderment.“Then what am I to do?’
She flinched again.“You said…you said you were prepared to continue the affair.”
A muscle jerked in his lean cheek, proof of his disquiet.“I lied.”
She’d always known it.Despite his enjoyment of her body, he’d made no effort to hide that in his view, her role as his mistress was a stepping stone to marriage.
Athene wrapped her arms around herself in an attempt to hold together.She felt ready to break into a thousand pieces.When she spoke, her voice came out as a reedy whisper.“Do you want us to part?”
His eyes bored into her, rifled all her secrets, including the greatest secret of all, that she loved him.“Do you?”
