Page 88 of Lord Garson's Bride
“We were all delighted, when she and Hugh became engaged. He’s a good man and perceptive enough not to push her too far too fast.”
Hughwasa good man. Jane braced to ask the question that she’d never been brave enough to ask her husband. “Do you know if Hugh and Morwenna were lovers?”
Fenella pondered before she answered. “I don’t believe so. In fact, I’m almost sure not.”
Jane shouldn’t be relieved to hear that. After all, the problem was his spiritual connection with his beloved, not anything physical they’d done. But nonetheless she was pleased.
Fenella went on. “That’s part of the problem. Garson never got to know Morwenna as a real woman with all the normal imperfections.”
“In his mind, she’s like an exquisite painting.”
“Yes. That makes it frightfully hard to live up to her image, I’m sure. And he’s such a knight in shining armor. Morwenna’s tragic loss made her doubly appealing, even if she wasn’t so beautiful.”
Of course Morwenna was beautiful. Fairytale princesses awaiting rescue from their towers always were.
“He’s always collected lame ducks, right from when he was a boy.” Jane sighed. “You could say I’m another lame duck. When he proposed, my father had died, and I was facing some unappealing choices after my cousin inherited my home.”
“You’re a very different woman from Morwenna, Jane.”
“Which doesn’t help.”
“Nonsense. Hugh and Morwenna weren’t meant to be. Morwenna never stopped loving Robert, and now they’re together and blissfully happy. Hugh has no hope of winning her back, even if honor permitted. You’re here. She isn’t.”
Jane’s lips turned down. “I’m here with all my faults.”
“All your warmth and gaiety and beauty.”
She shook her head. “It’s not enough.”
“Have you asked him if he still loves her?”
“No.” She shuddered at the idea. “I’m afraid to mention her name.”
“That only makes her more powerful,” Fenella said sharply. “I love Morwenna dearly, but she’s not superhuman.”
Jane shook her head again and pulled free of Fenella’s comforting hand. “In Hugh’s heart, she is superhuman. I can’t bear it.” Her voice broke on the last words, and she turned away toward the windows. She didn’t want Fen to see how close she was to breaking down.
“Jane?” Fenella asked, in sudden concern. “Are you all right?”
Jane fumbled for her handkerchief and dried the few stubborn tears she couldn’t stanch. She turned back to Fen. “It’s impossible, living with a man who loves someone else. Every moment feels like a punch in the face.”
“Oh, my dear…”
She stood on unsteady legs and stepped away from the sofa. If Fenella touched her in sympathy now, she really would lose control. If she did, she’d cry into next month. “I don’t know what to do.”
Fenella’s delicate features hardened in determination. “First, you must find out if you need to keep fighting this battle. Hugh feels something for you. That’s clear to everyone who cares about him. I’d hoped it was love—or at least its beginnings. But you say not, and you’re in a better position to know.”
“Love wasn’t part of our arrangement,” Jane said bleakly.
Fen made a dismissive sound. “Arrangements change as circumstances do. Believe me, when I met Anthony, the last thing I wanted was a new husband.”
Jane considered Fenella’s remark. Was she torturing herself over a phantom? “You’re right. All this silence only gives Morwenna more space in my marriage.”
“You won’t believe me, but if you met her, I think you’d like her. Most people do.”
Jane doubted it, although she was well aware that the real Morwenna wasn’t the same as the idealized Morwenna who set such a wedge between her and her husband. “I’d probably scratch her eyes out.”
Fen gave a huff of laughter. “Then it’s a good thing she rarely comes to Town.”
