Page 28 of Catching Captain Nash
“It would work for you, too, give you a chance to see if you like the rural life. I know you’ve got a lot of romantic notions of life on the land, the way landlubbers have romantic notions about the sea. But you’ve been in the navy since you were eleven. Tryit, see if you can straighten out the estate for me. Then if you like the place and the family is happy there, I’ll sell it to you. The land’s not entailed, so it’s mine to dispose of as I wish.”
“That’s very generous of you.”
“Not at all. By all reports, you’ve got your work cut out. But I think a challenge will keep you interested while you’re finding your feet back on land.”
Robert frowned thoughtfully into the gloomy interior. Could this offer at least a temporary solution to what he did with himself, now he left the navy?
It was odd how few regrets he’d felt when he resigned his captaincy. Since he was a boy, the navy had been his mistress, the perfect place for him to exercise his odd assortment of skills. He’d never wanted any other career.
Like all the Nash offspring, he was clever. He’d shown a precocious gift for mathematics, so he’d taken to navigation with an ease that had astonished his tutors.
He’d also been a lad who hungered for action and adventure. And yes, perhaps less admirable, he could admit now that he’d had a yen to cover his name in glory.
Today, on the other side of his ordeal in South America, he acknowledged how trivial that desire for fame had been. Now he just wanted to retire into obscurity and build a life with the people he loved.
The irony was that, as the admiral who had interviewed him pointed out, once the details of his escape got out—as they invariably would—he’d be famous all over again.
Chapter Ten
Morwenna went downstairs to find Caro and tell her that she and Robert planned to leave for Leicestershire. She found her sister-in-law in the library, writing a letter. To her four children back at Woodley Park, Morwenna guessed.
Caro was a marvelous mother, and Morwenna tried to follow her example when it came to Kerenza. So far, it seemed to be working, although at times she despaired of her ability to provide what her high-spirited, fatherless daughter needed.
Fatherless no more, thank God.
At Morwenna’s appearance, Caro surged to her feet and rushed over to give her a hug. “Morwenna, how are you managing?”
To her chagrin, that sympathetic question was all it took to demolish her hard-won control, and she burst into tears. “Oh, Caro...” she said thickly and hugged her dear friend back.
“Shh, shh, sweetheart,” Caro murmured, rubbing her back.
“I shouldn’t be blubbing,” Morwenna choked out into Caro’s welcoming shoulder. “I should be happy.”
“Of course you’re happy,” Caro said unsteadily, and Morwenna realized her friend was crying, too. “We all are.”
She let Caro draw her across to a leather sofa in front of the fire. Outside the rain tumbled down, and the light inside wassoft and gray. The library felt like a cozy sanctuary from the real world.
“I am happy. But...”
Caro pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and passed it to Morwenna, even as she wiped her damp eyes with her fingers. “But it’s all been too much to take in. And you’ve been so desperate to keep up a brave front for Robert.”
Morwenna sent Caro a thankful glance out of eyes glazed with tears. “He’s so afraid of losing his control...” Except for those moments when he’d moved inside her body. Then he hadn’t been controlled at all. And she’d loved it. “It’s hard not to turn into a complete watering pot. He’s been through so much and...and...”
“And it shows, although he works like the dickens to hide it. It nearly killed him, telling us as much about his captivity as he did. And it’s clear there was so much more, and so much worse. His courage breaks the heart.”
Morwenna sniffed and gave her friend a shaky smile. “When he was talking to all of us, I just wanted to put my arms around him and tell him that he’s safe now.”
Perhaps in the future, Robert would lay down his defenses long enough to accept comfort separate from desire. But not yet.
As if Caro read her thoughts, she said, “And you’re so afraid that he might break, because all that’s holding him together is pride and that great, brave heart.”
“The heart that kept him alive through his suffering. I really thought I wouldn’t be able to control myself when he told us that horrible, horrible story.”
Caro’s smile was misty. “I was close to bawling like a lost calf. Believe me. And Lord, I thought Silas was going to blow it all by losing his grip.”
“But he held on. He’s been brave, too.”
“The Nash men are remarkable. We’re lucky to have them.”
