Page 155 of A Blightress of Wrath
TheBlightressstared, her face a mask of eerie calm.Icould only watch in silence, my heart in pieces asIlooked upon moments in my mother’s life she’d never meant me to remember.
“Saelyn,” theBlightresswhispered and we were gone.
Thecropping of black rock under a charred maple tree appeared, and we watched asItoddled through the small stream, babbling unknown words in my own language, picking up rocks and splashing my chubby fingers in the clear water.
Mymother sat on the stream’s edge, her face broken in despair, her eyes red as she quickly tried to rid them of her tears.Shestruggled to laugh and smile as her small daughter picked up a rock and let it plop from her fingers back into the water.
TheBlightressshuddered, this time speaking in rising anger, “Saelyn!”
Aforest path appeared, my mother cradling the wailing babe in her arms.Borosfollowed, sniffing into the air.
“Shh,” my mother cooed. “Please,Saelyn.”Shelifted my forehead to her lips, kissing my head and pressing me to her chest, bouncing me softly, mumbling under her breath, “How?”Hervoice broke as she spoke into the forest air. “HowdoIdo this without you?”Sheknelt to the ground, her own sobs matching her child’s asBoroslay down with her, resting his head on her knee.
“Saelyn!” theBlightressroared, and we left again, only to find ourselves back in my mother’s rooms.
ThereIlay, a sleeping babe in her crib, bundled in a yellow swaddle, and there my mother lay, staring at the cold fireplace curled up into a ball, wrapping her arms around herself and crying her silent tears into the thick wool rug.
“SAELYN!”
Iflinched, unable to do anything but gasp at the scenes that flashed before us over and over.Mydays as a baby had been spent with my mother in the depths of mourning, and we were witness to them all.
Again,Saelyn.
Saelyn.
Saelyn.
Saelyn.
TheBlightressdid not stop, soon shouting my name a dozen times, and then a dozen times more, each one leading to the next scene of my mother’s torment, each one delivering my mother’s tears, her desperate cries, her rage, all whileIwas so small, a babe born into this world of loss and lost love.
“SAELYN!” theBlightressgasped and fell to her knees across from my mother in the same position on the floor of her rooms.Mymother’s tears splashed onto the floor while her daughter kicked her feet in the air, gnawing on the wooden lumen.
“Youhave his eyes,LittleLove,” my mother whimpered, wiping her fallen tear from her baby’s arm. “Heloves you just as much asMamaloves you.”Shewiped a hand across her face and under her nose, taking in a shuddering breath. “Youdo not know just how much you are loved,” she whispered, bending down to kiss my full red cheek.Icooed at her, kicking again.
“Yourparents loved you.”TheBlightressdidn’t stop the tear that slipped down her skin in a single stream of reflective light.
Isat on my own knees next to her, watching my mother brush at her baby’s hair, holding her sobs at bay. “Yes.”
“Yourmother suffered every day away from him,” she continued.
“Yes.”Iplaced my hand over hers.Shelooked away from my mother, instead meeting my eyes—my dark blue eyes that told a story of whereIhad come from and who had loved me enough to leave me.
“Ilove her,” she choked, inhaling in a shuddering gasp.
“Yes,”Irepeated in a truthIunderstood looking at her face, recognizing the same sorrowful expressionsI’dseen on my mother time and time again.
“Idon’t want her to suffer like this,” she managed, reaching out a hand to wipe the tears from my mother’s cheek, unable to do so.
“Thenlet’s go back,”Istarted, squeezing her hand again. “Youcan help me fix—all of this—so that we can move on with our lives in the happiness we are ready for.Mymother will always mourn my father, but without the threat of you taking me away, she can find some joy in her daughter’s life.Please,”Ibegged, “let’s go back and bury him.Giveher peace and rid the isle of yourBlight.Letour people be happy and prosper under the sun.Letthem rebuild what has been lost and let my mother live out her days asBaronofFelgren.”Iinched closer, desperation in my voice, “Lether no longer fear what can be taken from her.”Ipaused, wiping the next iridescent tear that fell down her cheek. “Iknow your fear.Itis my own.”
Hermouth pursed and her lips trembled.Isaw the weight of what she’d carried for centuries reflect through her eyes.Iknew her pain.Iknew the sharp bite of loneliness like my mother.Likethe powerful women before me,Itoo understood that empty chasm within and the fear of never filling it.Iswallowed back the lump in my throat, remembering the words my father had started long ago.WordsIknew he believed in.
Holdonto hope.
Defythe dark.
Thedark was here, right before us.Thetruth of what my parents had been through to keep me safe.Tokeep me loved by them, growing up inFelgrenwhereIbelonged. “Wecan do this together,”Icontinued.“Wecan let go of the fear of being alone.”
