Page 81 of Love, Nemesis
His next words surprised her.
“I’m glad she found you,” Lethe said. “Her death ripped every feeling I had left out of me, but it makes it a little better to know that in her final moments, there’s a chance she found her wayback to some version of a human being again. It’s good to know that she died that way.”
A long silence stretched out between them.
“How did you know her?” Ana asked the question that made her most uneasy.
“She was my wife,” he replied.
Her mouth opened but nothing came out.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
The clock was racing now, it seemed like.
“I’m sorry,” was all she could say, and he lingered there, hands by his sides, no expression on his face. For a moment, it was as if he was trying to figure out what to do.
He walked forward again, and she startled to find the wall already at her back. She eased her shoulder blades against it as Lethe neared, brows furrowed, searching her face.
When he was within feet of her, she was completely still, barely a breath in her lungs. A crushing weight pushed into her chest.
“You escaped to En Sanctus after it was over and grew up here, in the State,” Lethe said.
His expression darkened suddenly, and they stood face to face. He lifted a hand to her face, and she closed her eyes, nearly flinching at his touch.
She pressed her palms hard against the wall behind her, holding her breath as she felt his hand on the other side of her face.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
And then she felt his lips on her forehead.
Startled, she opened her eyes as he leaned away.
The ROSE kiss. It was a gesture to other ROSE, often as a greeting or departing salute, which said that beyond all experiences and differences, I see your soul, and I recognize it.
The gesture from him left her speechless in the ensuing silence, Ana still able to feel the imprint of his lips on her forehead as she recognized the familiar pain of loss in his eyes.
“She loved kids and had wanted so badly to set the slaves free,” he said softly. “She would have done anything to keep even one of you alive.” His hands fell back down by his side. “I’m glad you survived. Her death was not good, but if you’re a piece of her legacy, then that means…something.” He stepped away from her.
Ana’s mind raced to absorb and understand the words.
“I know I said justice is an illusion, but illusions are still powerful things,” he said. “My past is just a ghost, but you give me this little glimpse of it again, and somehow, I want to fight for it too. That feels good.” He stepped away from her. “Even if the feeling isn’t real, if feels good.” He turned before walking out into the hallway.
Shocked, Ana stared as she listened to his footsteps. A single tear loosened from her eye, running down her check. She wiped it with her fingertip, staring as it reflected the light from outside.
She hadn’t cried in years.
She slid down against the wall, staring out the door. Another tear escaped. Ana wiped her face again before another came.
She gritted her teeth as her chest heaved, pressing her palms against her eyes. She tried to breathe, but her breath caught, again and again.
