Page 30 of All In
Mar 19, 1998
Dear Maria,
I’m sorry, but I can’t meet you for lunch or coffee. And I think you know why. It’s best that we just stay, as you called us, “long distance friends.” That’s all I can give you right now. I would love to see you also and maybe we will run into each other somewhere someday. But intentionally meeting you for lunch or coffee, that I can’t do.
I’m pretty sure Cara or Nate wouldn’t like it.
Sincerely, Sam
Mar 31, 1998
Dear Sam,
You’re right. I shouldn’t have asked. I know that you wanted to keep these letters strictly friendly. I promise to do that from now on. And you’re right. Nate would be furious if he found out I met to have coffee with another man. Especially if that other man is you.
Love, Maria
Aug 1, 1998
Dear Maria,
I have to start off by apologizing for not writing for a few months. I think it was a couple of things. You asking to see me kinda felt strange, so I needed to distance myself for a while. Also, and you are going to like this one, I decided to take the leap and go back to school. I started in the spring and I’m taking classes through the summer because I really want to get going on this. When I finally made the decision, I honestly couldn’t wait to get started.
And my bosses Scott and Johnny, remember I told you about them. The bean guys. Well, they have been so cool about it. I really thought when I approached them they would say that they couldn’t work with me since I assumed their kind of work only happens during the day. Here, they hire guys to run security at night at the different jobs. So that’s what I’m doing now. School during the day, working security in the evenings. And of course, there is still Cara. Life has really, for the first time, felt good. Great even. And I have you to thank for that.
I’ll try to not let so much time pass between letters this time. I hope your summer is going well.
Sincerely, Sam
Aug 13, 1998
Dear Sam,
I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! I have no doubt that this will be everything that you need it to be.
School is going slowly for me, to say the least. At the rate I’m going, it looks like it will take me approximately seven or eight years to complete. I’ve already been going for longer than four and I’m only a sophomore. It’s frustrating but I won’t quit.
So you and Cara are still together?
Love, Maria
Aug 16, 1998
Dear Maria,
Please don’t ask me about Cara. Never once in my letters have I asked you about Nate. I think we need to make a new rule. We don’t ask the other about our relationships. If the other wants to bring up their boyfriend or girlfriend, that’s fine. But we can’t and shouldn’t ask.
I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but it has to be that way, Maria. If we want to continue to keep in touch, we have to do this. I know it has to be hard for you to think of me with someone else. Trust me when I say I know that feeling.
Sincerely, Sam
Sept. 6, 1998
Dear Sam,
You’re right and I’m sorry. It’s really none of my business what your relationship is or isn’t with Cara. I won’t ask again, I promise.
I’ve literally sat here for the last ten minutes wondering what to write because now, for the second time, I’ve made this weird. Ugh! Why am I like this? I drive myself crazy. You know me and you know how I am. I obsess about things that I can’t control. I also tend to get jealous easily. Heck, you know this about me. Do you remember when Mrs. Durcy assigned that pretty new girl Rebecca to be your chem lab partner? I know you do because I asked you about her every day all of junior year. And it’s not that I didn’t trust you. It was her I didn’t trust. Because let’s face it, you were a catch and she was a knockout.
