Page 65 of Ride or Die
xox Colton
My lip quivers as I pick up note after note of poems and love letters Colton wrote me over the years.
Dear Layla,
I am so glad I was the one to pick you up tonight and that I got you home safe. Being in your company was really special to me, and it's time you know that I have liked you for a long time. I have never known how to tell you how I feel about you. Half of me never admitted it out of fear of rejection by you, the other half wanted to protect you from the world I live in. I would do anything for you. I will give it all up for you. If you just give me a chance to prove to you I can be the man you deserve.
He takes that one out of my hand.
“This was the most recent,” he says. “I never got to finish it. I wrote it after picking you up that night after the race. I looked at the box, at all these love letters you never got to read, and that’s when I decided I was done writing. I was making my move. The next week, I saw you at the library and started trying to show you how I really feel about you.” His confession makes my eyes fill with tears.
Never did I expect anyone to care for and love me the way Colt has from afar for all these years.
“It might be cheesy, but I always held onto things like this, things that meant something to me. My mom always said love makes us richer than any material things ever could. We never had much that was tangible, so it was my way of finding value in something, I guess," he says a bit shyly, shrugging.
"There are tons of letters to you, my dad, Mom, and even myself in there. It was how I dealt with so many feelings while I had to play this hard-ass on the surface. Whenever you doubt my feelings for you, or if you see me do some fucked up shit, remember this box. All of this, this is me,” he says, pointing to it. “Not the asshole pulling business or the guy kicking the shit out of others. I made the stupid decision to do this shit when I wasa kid, and now I'm stuck doing it despite hating it. I don’t want you to ever see me differently. You are the only one in the entire world who actually knows me. I’ve said it before, but you own me, Layla. I love you.”
Colt takes a deep breath, his eyes flitting between mine. Without another word, he leans over and wraps his arms around me, wrapping me in the most intimate hug.
“Thank you, Colt, for loving me all these years. For finally telling me and letting me into your world. I never felt complete until I found you. I will never hold what you have to do against you. I know who you are, and I am so damn lucky I am the only one who gets the privilege of seeing the real you.”
He rubs my cheek and pulls me down onto the bed, holding me until it’s time to make dinner. Instead of the traditional turkey meal, we make a small beer can chicken with mashed potatoes and veggies, finishing with candy cane ice cream for dessert. Colt even made his mom a plate, and she came up to join us. He takes such good care of her.
She’s always suffered with her mental health, but after Colt’s dad left and her cancer treatments, things got even worse. Colt is determined to convince her to come with us when we leave, but she wants to stay, still believing his dad will come back for her.
Jen’s visit is short, with her mostly shoving food into her mouth at his desk, completely focused on the TV.
“I’m glad to see you kids happy and that you have each other. Love is a beautiful thing. Cherish it. Merry Christmas,” she tells us before leaving for work. Her wise words make us squeeze each other a little tighter.
After today, my heart feels so full because, for the first time, I feel like I’m home. It’s not the place, but the people you’re with, and I’ve never experienced that feeling until Colt let me into his life.
Now, all that’s left is to show him just how much I appreciate him. And I saved the best gift for last.
CHAPTER
THIRTY-TWO
BAD GIRL
LAYLA
I take a deep breath before tiptoeing to the bedroom in my robe. Through the cracked door, I spot Colt standing by his dresser, his naked torso highlighted beneath the soft glow of the Christmas lights.
Unaware I’m studying him, my eyes trace the lines of his defined, tattooed chest and arms. His fitted boxer briefs hug his muscular thighs, emphasizing his perfect ass and bulge. He is mouthwatering to look at.
My heart rate accelerates as I stare, and I’m reminded how lucky I am that I’m the one who gets to enjoy every inch of this man.
Needing to touch him, I slip through the door and close it behind me. Colt’s head snaps up, and when our eyes meet, I smile softly, dropping my robe to the floor. Hand on my hip, I jut it out to the side, exuding confidence in my sheer black lace bodysuit bustier.
His teeth sink into his lower lip, and he whistles, eyes crawling down the entire length of my body. I have to bite my cheek to keep from smiling.
“Wow, Lay, you look amazing. I’m so glad you came in dressed like that, because I have some fun things planned too,” he says lowly, turning to his dresser to grab something.
When he turns back, a pair of handcuffs dangles from his index finger, arousal smoldering in his eyes. My thighs instinctively squeeze together to ease the throb between them. Colt notices, chuckling to himself because he knows all my tells. He's wearing a sexy smirk that says he’s about to do unspeakable things to me. The thought alone has heat spreading across my skin and through my veins.
"Are you okay with this?" He swings the cuffs back and forth on his finger.
I bite my lip and nod, happy he wants to start with handcuffs and not something more intense. We’ve talked about how I want to push my sexual boundaries, keep learning what I like, and I love that Colt knows how to do it at my pace without even asking.
