Page 86 of King of Pain
“You’re killing me.”
I grin, but then my smile sobers just slightly. “What I’m saying, Chance, is that it’s going to take me some time to experienceeverythingsexual again as something that ismy choice.” I meet his gaze, unwavering. “Last night at the club?Thatwas my choice. And it was perfect. Incredible.”
Chance’s expression softens, his fingers twitching at his sides. “Ant—”
I step closer. “You are the person I want to give the most important first they didn’t take from me,” I say, voice steady, sure. “You’re going to be my first kiss, Chance Sullivan. But I need a little time, if that’s okay.”
He stares at me for a long beat before grabbing his chest like he’s beenshotand dramatically flopping onto his back in the sand.
I laugh, reaching down to offer him a hand. “Come on, drama queen.”
He grins, brushing himself off. Before I can overthink it, I reach out with one hand and swipe the sand off his ass, letting my palm linger on one of his perfect globes. Then, just to bethorough,I give the tiniest, gentlest squeeze.
He glances back over his shoulder and raises a brow.
I shrug. “Had to kick the tires if I’m gonna buy the rig.”
And damn, what a rig it is.
I jog ahead of him, turn around, and shout, “Race you to our room! I wanna go to dinner!”
Chance just stands there; jaw dropped.
Oh yeah.
The first few bricks are crumbling from my walls, and the new me is peeking out, ready to play.
TRACK THIRTY•FOUR
Catch Me (I’m Falling)
Chance
We step back into our motel room, the cheesy bedside seashell lamp casting soft shadows against the navy and wicker decor. The room smells like sea air and something distinctlyusnow—Ant’s spicy cologne, the lingering salt on our skin, and the faintest trace of the tequila still in our system.
I let the door swing shut behind us and exhale, running a hand through my hair. My mind is still stuck on everything Ant shared on the beach. I knew his past held darkness. I knew it was bad. Butthat? That level of horror? I had no idea. And the worst part? He talked about it like it was justa thing that happened to him. Just a quiet acceptance of something no one should ever have to accept.
Yet somehow, despite all of it, he’s still standing.Still shining.
I glance over at him as he toes off his shoes, shaking his fingers through his hair, that effortless beauty still robbing my lungs of oxygen.
It’s not just what he told me today that’s rattling me.
It’sthe way he’s been on this trip. The way he pulled me to him in the club, the way hereachedfor me last night, wrapping me around his body without a second thought.
And then today.
He held my hand.
That probably shouldn’t feel like athing, but to me, it is. Hell, even when I was with Christian, everything was behind closed doors. But Ant laced our fingers together like it was nothing.Like it wasn’t one of the hardest things he’s ever done. It’s a huge step for him, and he chose to take it… with me.
I haven’t even kissed him yet, and he’s already given me more than anyone ever has.
Andfuck me…he’s never been kissed.
Never.
He handed me the privilege on a silver platter today. My possessive heart races at the thought of being the first man to claim those lips. The only one. He told me he needs time, and I’dgive him forever if he needed it. But the thought of being the only man to ever taste him?
