Page 80 of Threat of Danger
“You never told me.”
“You refused to see me.”
She shook her head. “You never came to the hospital.”
“I went every day. Your father wouldn’t let me in. He said you told him not to.”
She shook her head again, dazed. “I don’t remember.” Then, a moment later, “I probably did say that, at the beginning.”
“He kept to those orders. I was not to contact you in any way. You were upset, and everyone was worried that I’d upset you even more.”
“And when I got home?”
“I was turned away at the door. I sat nights under your window with a pebble in my hand.” He hung his head. “I never threw it. I felt so damn guilty for my part in your ordeal, for not being strong enough to stop it. I figured I didn’t deserve to see you. If you thought it’d hurt you to see me ... I had no right to push you.”
She took several seconds to digest that. “Part of me was mad at you. I think deep down I always knew it was stupid.”
“But there was nobody else to blame.”
“I could have blamed the man.”
“He was dead, as far as anyone knew. A live guilty party is a lot more satisfying.”
“I went to the cabin with you. I wanted to. I blamed you so I wouldn’t have to blame myself.” She groaned and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she said, “Just like my mother blamed me so she wouldn’t have to blame herself.” She groaned again. “God, I’m my mother.”
“I like Rose. What’s wrong with her?”
“Nothing,” Jess said after a moment. “Those three days in the camper changed everything for me. And nobody seemed to get it. Like ...” She paused. “As if I’d been a fish, living in a lake all my life, and then suddenly I was pulled to dry land, but everyone I’d ever known kept saying,Keep swimming!While I was gasping for oxygen. And I wanted to scream that there was no swimming where I was now. I couldn’t even breathe there.”
Not taking her into his arms about killed Derek. “I’m sorry. I was a typical nineteen-year-old guy, just thinking,Hey, I thought we were going to die, but we’re both alive. Hooray!”
“You were right. I should have focused on that too, instead of being angry with everyone and running.”
“In hindsight, I’m glad you left. If we’re right and the bastard is still alive, he might have gone after you again to finish what he started.”
She shuddered.
“Do you know what I wonder sometimes?” he asked as they walked. “How did he find us after we escaped? I was running all over the place, lost some of the time, and at other times, deliberately trying to confuse tracks. So how did he catch up with us at the river?”
“He’s a good tracker?”
“Has to be. And he knows the woods like the back of his hands.”
“A hunter?”
“That’s my best guess.” He shook his head. “Trouble is, most everybody hunts around here.”
They fell silent, each deep in their thoughts as they walked. Then Jess stopped in her tracks, staring forward when she finally recognized the path she’d subconsciously taken. Derek had known where they were heading, but merely followed her instead of warning her. If she needed to be here, he would be here with her.
They were at the burned-down cabin, charred bricks and black, broken beams.
“Do you ever wonder,” she asked, “what life would be like if we had never come to the cabin that day?”
More times than it was healthy.
“Something like this,” he said, pulling her into his arms at long last and kissing her.
For a long, long moment, she let him; then she pulled back. Her gaze searched his. “Why did you do that?”
