Page 60 of Threat of Danger
She’d tried to think that he was the man who’d witnessed her bloody torture, so what they were doing had to be all wrong, couldn’t be right. But instead, her heart had said he was the one who’d helped her off that water tower, he was the one who’d freed her and carried her away from the camper that had been their prison for three endless days, and he was the one to come over and shovel the snow off the roof for her mother and Zelda in her absence.
No.She couldn’t think that. She couldn’t, or she would fall for him all over again.
She needed to tell him that the kiss had been a mistake, and this wasn’t what she wanted. She hadn’t come home for this. He needed to respect her boundaries.
So ... she needed to work up the courage to talk with Derek. Not that she had concerns about him, that he’d somehow be a jerk about it. He wasn’t like that. She was concerned that she would cave and ask him to kiss her again. She needed to put all her walls firmly in place. Maybe dig a moat around her heart.
OK, not a moat. He was a SEAL. Water wouldn’t stop him.
Dammit.
“I can’t believe Eliot left so fast.” Pam gasped for oxygen. “I barely got to see him. You’re so lucky. There are so many hot men in Hollywood. Here ...” She stopped, either trailing off into a meaningful silence or no longer able to breathe.
“How bad can it be?” Jess glanced at Pam to make sure she was OK. “Look at all those sugar workers and lumberjacks. Have you seen those muscles?”
“Saw them. Wept over them. Everyone’s married.” Pam grunted as they began the slight incline to the Taylor farm. “You wanna know how bad it is?” Gasp. “I joined the Versquatchers.”
Jess laughed. “It can’t be that bad.”
Pam shot her a dark look while gasping some more. “It’s the only place with single men left.”
“If Chuck wasn’t president, I’d say there’s a reason for that.” Jess slowed. “But I feel like I owe him allegiance. I shouldn’t bad-mouth his club.”
“Chuck’s a gem.” Gasp. “If he wasn’t mad about Zelda ...”
Jess swallowed a grin. “I see you did consider everything.”
“I had the time.” Gasp. “LoooongVermont winters.” Gasp. “Remember?”
Jess tried. Back in the day, she’d spent her winters daydreaming about Derek, and riding with him to school and back. Fall, winter, and spring flew by way too fast. Summers, now those were endless. She’d barely seen him during summers. He’d usually been off at some insufferable rugby camp.
“You have to come and visit me in LA,” she said to Pam.
Pam threw her hands into the air and mouthed,Hallelujah. “I thought you’d never ask.”
She slowed even further and gulped air. “Hey, do we have to kill ourselves today?” She gulped some more oxygen. “We’re down to the last mile.” She took a moment to shoot Jess a thoroughly reproachful look. “I’m too young to cough up a lung.” More breathing. “Someday I might need it.” A pause for effect. “You know, like for screaming during wild sex.”
Jess cut back to a walk. “Sorry. Habit.”
“Sure.” Pam wiped her face with the back of her hand in what looked like a careless move, but, miraculously, she didn’t smudge any of her makeup. “Brag about regularly running like a race hound. Go ahead.”
“You should come to a training with Eliot when you visit. You could meet some of the guys on the team.”
“Yeah. No, thanks.” Pam grunted. “I’m not at my most attractive when I’m swimming in sweat and gasping for air.” She gestured at Jess with faint accusation in her eyes. “Not all of us can run ten miles and look like a movie star the whole time.”
As a long-ago memory bubbled up in her mind, Jess smiled. “First time Eliot made me run ten miles, I threw up on his shoes at the end.”
“Yuck. Upchuck Charlie.” But Pam was grinning at last. “Eliot should totally throw you over for me.” She sighed. “I can absolutely guarantee that I’ve never in the past and will never in the future throw up on anyone from too much exercise.”
“You do yoga.”
“It’s a slow sport, in case you haven’t noticed.” Pam caught her breath now that they were walking. “And you do half of it lying down. I mean, that’s exercise I can do. I’m great flat on my back. No pun intended. But you can totally tell Eliot that.”
Jess snorted a laugh.
“I mean,” Pam added, “if you’re not into him that way. I got the vibe that things were cooling off. Especially toward the end.”
“We’re friends.” Jess definitely didn’t want to lose that. “But I don’t think we’ll ever be more. There was a moment, and the moment passed without either of us grabbing it. I think he’s OK with that. He had some hang-ups about the two of us working together to start with. He came after me. The chance was there. It didn’t work. When I fly back to LA, things will be like they were before. He’s not the kind of guy who’d make it awkward.”
