Page 57 of I Don't Need Your Love
I run my finger along her hand. “Itdoesmatter because you clearly can’t let it go and give us a chance to be friends.”
She turns back to the window. “I don’t want to be your friend.”
Ouch…
“But why?”
She shrugs.
“Is it the girls?” I ask. “Does it bother you that I’ve hung out with so many—?”
“Oh my gosh, you’re so full of yourself.” She faces me. “I’ve hated you for years because you and Blake—well, really you—treated me like garbage when we were kids. I didn’t have friends. I didn’t have anyone to hang out with or play with. Blake was my best friend, but you took him away from me. I was so lonely. And every time I tried to hang out with you guys, you treated me like crap and purposely shut me out. You didn’t want me anywhere near you. How was six-year-old me supposed to feel?”
I open my mouth to respond, but she goes on. “But forget it. It was so long ago, it doesn’t even matter.”
I shake my head as I reach for her hand again. “Stop saying it doesn’t matter. It does. I’m sorry, Carly. I’m so sorry I did that. No explanation I give will excuse what I did. I was such a jerk.”
She doesn’t say anything, though the anger in her eyes starts to shift to pain. I hate that I caused her pain. But she doesn’t understand…and I’m not ready to tell her.
“I was…” I clear my throat. “I was going through something and needed a friend. Blake was there for me. He listened to me, helped me deal with my problems. But it wasn’t right for me to steal your brother from you.”
Her gaze drops to where my hand still clutches hers. Slowly, I drop it.
“Thanks for apologizing,” she says in a low voice. “I didn’t know you were going through something. I guess I didn’t realize you needed a friend, too.”
I nod slowly. “Still wasn’t right to push you away.”
“I get it. We were kids. Why would you and Blake want his annoying sister around?”
“You weren’t annoying.”
“I kind of was.”
There’s a small smile on her face, which fills me with hope that we might be starting to repair the damage between us.
I return her smile. “Well, maybe a little.”
She playfully shoves my shoulder. “You’re not supposed to say that.”
“And you’re still annoying now.”
“Oh my gosh! Get out of my seat.”
She shoves me, but I catch both her hands in mine. I look into her beautiful green eyes. “Seriously, Carly. I’m very sorry for all the pain I caused you.”
She stares back into my eyes. Her chest rises and falls softly, and I feel my own doing the same.
I tug on one of her ribbons. “Am I forgiven?” I whisper. “Maybe we can start over?”
“I…”
I move my hand to her cheek. “Maybe you’ll learn I’m not such an ignoramus cretin after all?”
She searches my eyes, as though trying to figure out if I’m serious or not. How do I convince her that I mean every single word? How can I get her to trust me?
“Ryder!” voices screech. Hands circle my chest and I’m yanked out of my seat. It’s a few girls from the team and they’re dragging me toward the back of the bus. “Come sit with us!”
“Wait…” My voice is drowned out by their excited chatter.
