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Because of what happened four years ago, I’ve become even more obsessed with books. They take me away from my problems for a bit and make me feel hopeful. Right after the accident, I didn’t read. I shut myself off completely. Then, after moving to Boston, I picked it up again. My grandfather had to build a bookshelf to hold all my books. Now, they’re stacked up in my room in huge piles because there’s no room on my bookshelf.

Soft laughter enters my ears as the guys crowd around Lexi, each one telling her how excited they are for dance practice after school tomorrow. I’m glad she hasn’t given it up. I always loved watching her dance and cheering her on at recitals.

I love seeing her eyes light up. They remind me of a different time, when life was good. When I was a happy kid. When I was the first person she ran to whenever she had something to tell us. But it’s selfish of me to think these thoughts. I was the one who left her.

She must feel me watching her because her gaze drifts in my direction. She gives me another shy smile. She’s never been shy with me before, but I can’t expect us to go back to the people we were. I wouldn’t be surprised or blame her if she doesn’t trust me.

There’s something I need to say to her. Something I need to do that I should have done years ago.

I inch closer to her, and the guys step aside like I’m a king heading to his queen. Lexi straightens up from the locker she was leaning on, beautiful green eyes on me.

“I…” I push some bangs out of my eyes. “Can I talk to you?” I shift in my spot. “I mean, can we go somewhere…?” My voice trails off as the bell rings.

Lexi’s face falls, like she’s very curious what I have to say to her and hates the bell for preventing it from happening. “Sure, we can talk. Um…maybe at lunch?”

I nod. “Yeah. Lunch.”

“Who do you have for first period?” Finn asks me.

“Aunt Ally.”

“Nice! We’re all in her class.” Theo holds out his fist for a bump and I bump it. Then all eight of us head to Aunt Ally’s class. She’s Uncle Zack’s wife and teaches English. I’ve never had her class before, but Zoey and her friends and the rest of my cousins have told me her classes are the best in the world. I can’t wait. She and I always talk books, so if it’s anything like our discussions, it will be my favorite class.

Lexi walks beside me as we make our way to the classroom. Her hand is only inches away from mine. When we were younger, we used to hold hands a lot. Not in a romantic way, but as friends. She was so adventurous and fun and always grabbed my hand and pulled me places. Like to the large slide in the park when we were eight. I was too scared to go down it, but she made it seem so effortless. I don’t think anything scares her.

I don’t realize I’m staring at her until she tucks some hair behind her ear, smiling shyly. Finn, on her other side, keeps her busy talking about the comic book he read yesterday. All the guys like comics while I prefer novels.

Aunt Ally is at her desk, reading a romance novel as the students gather inside. Her head lifts and her expression shifts as she spots me enter the classroom. She and Uncle Zack came over last night for dinner in honor of my return. Aunt Ally was impressed with my collection of books, but was dismayed to learn I didn’t have any romance books she could borrow.

Since she’s my teacher, she has to treat me like a student and not her nephew, but she gives me a smile meant only for me. I wave before joining the others, who have saved a seat for me. Allof us are gathered at the back of the room, with Lexi in the center desk.

Aunt Ally begins the lesson by asking the students if anyone read the assigned reading over the summer. Not a single kid raises their hand. Even though she expects it, Aunt Ally is still bummed.

Her eyes move to me. “Did you read it, Brock?”

“I read it last year at my old school.”

“Good. Would you like to discuss the themes?”

I’ve never liked having eyes on me, but it’s different now. Especially because I’m the latest gossip around Edenbury High. But Aunt Ally is so desperate for someone to discuss the book, so I talk about the themes.

She grins. “Very good, Brock.” Then she faces the class and continues to gush about it. The kids don’t look bored like my former students did at my old school. Everyone is wide awake and absorbing her words like they’re sponges.

I smile as I watch their expressions. Everyone was right about Aunt Ally’s class. It’s too bad the bell rings and she’s forced to end the lesson.

As my friends and I leave the classroom, Aunt Ally says, “Brock, can I talk to you for a second?”

I make my way over to her.

“Hey, Brock.”

“Hi.”

She searches my eyes. “Is everything okay? How are you adjusting to your new school?”

What she’s really asking is if I’m falling apart from all the memories crashing down on me. The school is different, but the kids are the same. Every single kid I grew up with is here.

Except for one.