Page 128 of Crazy In Love
Curious, Amedeo rolls his bottom lip between his thumb and finger. “This is correct. Technology removes the limitation on one’s workspace. I, myself, am working remotely today. You accept these terms?”
“Not in their entirety.” I draw a heavy breath and fill my lungs with the bravery I so desperately need, then exhaling again, I meet Booker’s eyes. Since, really, he’s my boss. Amedeo needn’t even be here. “I wish for five days a week remote work, but I accept monthly meetings, here or in Rome. Or London, even. Wherever you need me to be.”
“Five days a—” Booker shakes his head. “How would that be possible? You can’t do half of your job remotely.”
“Right.” I lean forward and slide my envelope closer to him. “Sadly, that leads me to this.”
“This?”
“My resignation, effective immediately.”
“What?” He snatches up the envelope and rips the seal open. Tearing my single sheet of paper out, he speed-reads as fast as his eyes can move. “Effective as of the date of this letter… resignation from Gable, Gains, and Hemingway… appreciate your guidance and…”He swings his eyes back to mine and growls. “I don’t accept your resignation.” He slaps the paper back to his desk. “I don’t know what the hell has come over you, Fox, butthis,” he points at me, “this is not you. We have way too much history for me to let you quit when I damn well know, six weeks ago, you were content exactly the way things were.”
“Which leads me to my next confession: I was hoping you wouldn’t accept.” I close my contract and place my hands over top, then I offer Booker a kind smile and another for Amedeo. “I would love to learn from you both. I mean that with full sincerity. I don’twantto leave Gable, Gains, and Hemingway. My loyalty remains with the company that took me from my professional infancy, making it possible for me to flourish and learn. However,” I bring my focus back to Booker, “I grew way too comfortable in this job. It was easy. It was fun. It was rewarding and fancy, and honestly, it simply made me feel good.”
“So, what’s the problem?”
“I’m still paying student loans for a degree I don’t use. I’ve allowed myself to become complacent, letting the education I worked really freakin’ hard for dissolve in the back of my brain while I fill it with other, less relevant things.”
“We’re giving you a chance to do exactly as you’re asking for,” Amedeo counters. “Forgive me. I’m confused by your hesitation.”
“Rome is my hesitation.” I swallow and drag my eyes back to Booker. “And New York. And London. And literally every other town or city or place that exists where my familydoesn’t.”
“Your family?”
“I would’ve begged you for a lobotomy six weeks ago if I said these words, and I promise you, my hands sweat even now. But…” I lift my shoulders in a nervous shrug. “I’m moving to Plainview.”
He barks out a loud, mocking laugh, throwing his head back and slapping the desk.
While he does that, I look at Amedeo and grit my teeth. “Just give him a second. He’ll stop.”
“Plainview?! Fox, you called it the Hillbilly capital of Bumfuck Alabama!”
I wrinkle my nose. “It’s not actually in Alabama.”
“I know it’s not in Alabama!” His laughter cuts away, and his rage takes over. “Did you go on a cocaine bender while you were out there? Have a mental breakdown? I swear, the Fox who left and the Fox who came back arenotthe same person!”
“They’re not.” I settle back in my chair and slow my breathing, lest I cry like a tool and ruin every shred of credibility I have with these men. “I’m not that person anymore. And even if that’s freaking you out a little bit, I actually think it’s a good thing.”
“Fox—”
“I healed while I was gone. I hurt. I grew, and I might’ve thrown a tantrum or two. I was treated badly by some of the locals. And I was treated well by others. I learned what it’s like to have a family, and worse, what it’s like to sit outside and stare in while they lived their lives. I’ve spent nearly three decades throwing up walls, preparing my comebacks, and stacking my barbs for whoever broached my defenses. I was determined to expose them before they exposed me.”
Heavy black brows pinch above Amedeo’s eyes. “What is it you think you are, Ms. Tatum?”
“A coward, mostly. An island of misfits, but I’m the only one who lives there. I’m a child of trauma who wants so badly to be doted on, but when I am, I tell myself I don’t deserve it. That’s why I like my job so much.” I cast my eyes back to Booker. “It’s easy and it’s fun. But more importantly, it comes with praise. So much freakin’ praise. And I figure, I deservedthatpraise. Because we have the data on staff morale that says what I do matters.”
“What you dodoesmatter! That’s why we’re offering you oodles of money, dummy.”
“Getting paid to be told I’m amazing.” I fold my arms and bring my pinky fingernail up to my lips. “It’s the easiest, most fulfilling cash I ever made. And I assure you, the idea of letting that go isterrifying.”
“So don’t! If the thought of moving to Rome elicitsthiskind of reaction, then don’t go. It’s okay to think you wanted something, then change your mind. You don’thaveto accept the job.”
“For me to agree with you on that point, I must also acknowledge that it’s okay to think Ididn’twant something. But now I do.”
Like a true New Yorkian, he turns his nose up in disgust. “You want Plainview?”
“I want Plainview. I want roosters on the fence and cows in the yard. I want the gossip vines, though I look forward to a certain few old ladies kicking over in the next ten or so years.”
