Page 67 of The Trailer Park Twink
“Don’t say his name,” Ezra shrieks, making the two of us jolt. I look over my shoulder at him, scoffing, but he’s staring out the window, so I don’t think it’s doing anything to convey my current annoyance. Unaware I’m watching, he whispers, “Fucking hate Johnny. Hope to fuck he dies.”
“Jealousy, jealousy, jealousy,” Daddy sings, and I have to gape at him, because I don’t know how he knows the words to a long-forgotten Paris Hilton album track, but color me intrigued, Mr. Daddy.
Daddy thinks Bubba and Ezzy are destined for domestic bliss, but I just brush it off each time he mentions it, because I know my Ezzy, and he’s never going to be happy being a trailer park princess like me. He’s essentially a poodle expecting to be pampered at all times, and he won’t get a whole lot of pampering with the new living situation.
I’m pretty sure Daddy’s spot-on in his assessment though, because the jealousy is clear as the water in Clearwater, Florida, and it’s slathered all over Ezra’s face anytime anyone mentions Johnny’s name. Maybe the heart is stronger than what’s in Bubba’s wallet.
I stare at my biffle in the mirror, opening my mouth to blast more sass at him, but then I spot a teardrop dripping down his cheek. My heart skips a beat, and not in a feel-good way. I may hate his current behavior, but I don’t hate my Ezzy, and now he’s shattering down to dust. Well, shattering intoa puddle. Or maybe melting? Ah, fuck, who gives a shit how he’s shattering, all that matters is he’s hurting, and I can stop it. I know he was a jerk by not pulling his weight during our trailer home’s upheaval—and yes, I know. You’re confused. You don’t understand what this whole trailer-relocation situation is all about. Well if you would give me a single second to explain and just the slightest bit of faith that I know how to land a metaphorical plane, maybe you’d find out, but here we are, wasting time on this goddamn foolishness. Trust me. We’ll fucking get to it, okay?—but I don’t ever want to see him cry.
I unbuckle my seat belt and crawl over the center console, trying to climb into the back seat, earning a quick slap to the ass from Daddy.
“What the hell are you doing? That’s a bad, bad boy. Don’t ever take your seat belt off while I’m driving again.”
I simply wiggle my ass at him like a slut and continue my journey. As soon as I’m safely back there, I nuzzle up next to Ezra, ignoring the trash bag resting in the seat on the other side, giving my best friend an unrequested cuddle.
I never should have mentioned Johnny. That asshole was the queer straw that broke my best friend’s back, if my best friend was a camel. Not the best turn of phrase, I know, but it’s true.
After Johnny stopped sleeping over at Bubba’s house, he set out to reclaim his alleged title of—and these are his words, not mine—Tallulah’s Top Pussy Hound. It didn’t last long,because the second Bubba and Ezra made it back to Tallulah, Johnny came crawling back the day Bubba got home. Apparently, the girl he tried reclaiming the title with took one look at his cock and laughed him out of the room and out of their new relationship. Maybe he’s got a small dick. Maybe she just didn’t like the fact he’s uncut. I don’t know. Either way, he spent a day and a half sobbing into Bubba’s chest, telling him how hard it was to land a date with a woman, because he looks like a Trump supporter, even though he’s a liberal, and they don’t trust him. I don’t blame them in the slightest, because in this day and age, fuck dating anyone on the bottom rung of God’s preferred political pecking order. I one-hundred percent understand why women would choose the bear when their only other option is a sea of maga cucks.
Oh, sure, Johnny swore he was sorry for hurting Bubba until he was blue in the face, begging and pleading for them to still be best friends. Sobbing, apparently, demanding a platonic cuddle right then and there because he missed Bubba so much. All while Ezra had to stand there and watch. And now they’re all moving to fucking Minnesota with us. There’s nothing sweet about this situation, because this is supposed to be a golden era for Daddy and me. Our love story’s only just been written, and now it’s already overtaken by a pack of mother-frackers.
“You’re a lot cuter than Johnny,” I whisper, rubbing his shoulder in an attempt to ease some of his hurt. Johnny and Bubba might have history, but Ezzy and Bubba have a whole future ahead of them, all they have to do is take it. With the way they stare at each other like teenagers overcome with puppy love, the heart wants what it wants, and it’s clear as day they want each other. “You’re nicer and kinder, and you’ve got a much cuter butt. Meanwhile, he’s walking around with a potbelly, and he’s got the hairline so high, it looks like he has a fivehead.” I fling my hands in the air dramatically. “Let’s face it, Ez. The man is a total loser.”
“The man is sitting right here,” Johnny, the trash bag, growls from the seat beside me. Loser. “And don’t worry, Ezra. The feeling’s fuckin’ mutual. Asshole.”
“Whatever,” Ezra says, turning to stare out the window.
“Where the hell did you come from?” I ask, feigning ignorance, because I’m sick of his face. Sick of him moving in without asking, even if Bubba kind of asked on his behalf.
Johnny blinks at me. “I’ve been riding with you since Texas. I’ve been here the whole fuckin’ time, bro. We literally shared a bag of popcorn an hour ago.”
“That was you?” A ridiculous question, considering I’ve been shooting him dirty looks in the rearview mirror for the whole ride. I just figure if I pretend he doesn’t exist, it might come true. “I must’ve mistaken you for a stowaway skunk.Lord knows you’ve got the personality and godawful scent of one.”
“Dude, why are you being so hostile? I ain’t got a problem with you.”
“Well, we’ve got one now. No one stands in the way of my best friend’s HEA. If you try to, I’ll claw your heart out with my bare hands.” I chew my cheek as he raises an eyebrow like he’s asking me if this is really the path I wish to travel, and the look he’s giving me tells me that I, in fact, do not want to take this journey, because he could break me in two with the might of his thumb. I’m just a little guy and I don’t want to end up in the emergency room with a broken face, so I look down and sigh. “Sorry.”
The truck comes to a stop and Daddy turns to give us a stern glare. “Now, I’ve had enough of this. We’re all in this together, and I ain’t about to let our new home descend into hateful glances and catty catchphrases meant to cut each other down. This ends now. I want all of you to apologize, or I’ll drop you off here and you can walk the rest of the way.”
Ezra leans the side of his face against the window and sighs. “Sorry.”
I open my mouth to object, but the look Daddy gives makes me pause. I’m pretty sure if I talk back, I’ll end up over his knee with a blistered ass, and as fun as that sounds, I can’t bring myself to talk back. Poor Daddy had to listen to Ezra and Ibicker for days on end, trapped in his oversized pickup truck, so I know we have to be getting on his nerves, and I don’t like when he’s nervous. It doesn’t suit him. The way his mouth curls down in a sexy frown. How his eyes squint smaller as he groans out his annoyance. I don’t want to be his bad boy, because I’m bad all the time, and he deserves better.
“I’m sorry. Really, Daddy.”
He gives me a stoic nod, but there’s a hint of pride swirling in his big brown eyes. “Good boy. Alright, your turn, Johnny.”
Johnny blinks at him. “I’m literally just sitting here. I didn’t sign up for this shit.”
He’s right. He didn’t sign up to bicker and complain like me and Ezzy. When given the chance of riding with us or with the other two members of the Core Four, he surprised us all by agreeing to ride with us. Ezra insists he’s doing it so he can listen to any master plans he has to seduce Bubba, but he swears up and down he doesn’t want a romantic entanglement with anyone right now. Lies, lies, lies.
“Apologize, young man,” Daddy warns, but it just earns him a glare.
“Don’t try to pull that age play shit with me. You all might be into it, but I’m not. I ain’t nobody’s good boy.”
“And you never will be with that attitude,” Ezra mumbles.
“Sorry, what was that comment?” Johnny snaps.
