Page 17 of Unmasking Mayhem
“Shh, it’s okay,” a calm voice murmurs, low and soothing. "I’ve got you."
I glance up to find Carter's face just inches from mine, his features etched with concern. “You scared me,” he says, the hint of a smile breaking through the gravity of the moment.
“What are you doing?” I manage to choke out, my voice hoarse—not from the run, but from the tumult of emotions swirling within me.
“I couldn’t let you walk this path alone, not after everything. There was a message, and I wasn’t going to wait around for you to get caught in it,” he replies, gently setting me down against the rough bark of a nearby tree. The scent of pine surrounds us, grounding me amidst the chaos of my racing thoughts.
“I didn’t expect you to wait for me.” I shake my head in disbelief, half relieved and half embarrassed by my impulsive desperation.
The shadows seem to flicker with the memory of fear, but there’s something about Carter’s presence that softens it, and I can't explain it. This man fucking lied to me and betrayed me, and yet I can't seem to just walk away from him. But that's how I am; I crave the toxicity and run away from the safety. I prefer the chaos over the comfort and seem to need the bad and run away from the good things.
“Yeah, well, I’d rather take my chances out here than let you face whatever’s ahead on your own.” He shifts a bit, casting a nervous glance toward the path we had just run.
“Can you tell me what you saw? What made you take off like that?” I ask, afraid to know what the message said. Frustrationwells within me as I struggle to articulate the confusion of my emotions.
"It's Havoc," he finally admits, his voice just above a whisper. “He's not waking up…” Carter steps closer, his eyes piercing through the dark with an intensity that anchors me.
I let his words wash over me, filling the cracks where doubt has begun to seep in. “I need to see him,” I whisper. "I feel like the darkness is coming for me, and he's the only one who can pull me out of it."
“There’s light in you, and you have to keep shining, even when it feels like the shadows are creeping in. You’re not powerless anymore,” Carter insists, his voice unwavering. He stands tall in the dim light, a lighthouse in the stormy seas of my mind.
I find myself searching his eyes for the truth in his words, clinging to the hope he offers while my heart beats a frantic rhythm in my chest.
“But what if I can’t?” The anxiety twists like a vine around my thoughts, choking the optimism he’s trying to instill. “What if the darkness swallows me whole?”
Carter’s gaze softens, and he brushes a stray hair from my face, the touch gentle yet insistent. “Then you fight back. You’ve fought through worse than this. Remember who you are, not just who you’ve been.”
His relentless belief in me sends a tremor through my core, but self-doubt fights back with every ounce of strength it can muster.
“This isn’t just about me anymore,” I counter, the weight of responsibility pressing down sharply. “It’s about Havoc too. I can’t stand by and do nothing while he’s... while he’s...” My voice falters, the gravity of my words suffocating in the air between us.
“I know,” he reassures me quietly, and just for a moment, I can see the fear lingering in his own eyes. “But we need to take one step at a time. We can’t help him if we don’t help ourselves first.”
With a shuddering breath, I nod, feeling the warmth of his presence like a lifeline. I study his face, memorizing the contours, the determination etched in every line. He’s still here, choosing to stand by me despite the storms we’ve weathered together. I wish I could consolidate the conflicting emotions stirring in my gut—a part of me wants to trust him, while another wants to bolt and shut my heart off completely.
“Okay,” I say slowly. “What’s the plan?”
Carter’s expression hardens, stripped of its previous sweetness. “We need to get to the club. If Havoc’s condition is as serious as I fear, he might need access to everything we can provide. And I need you with me. You’re the one who knows him best. You can break through.” There’s desperation in his voice, reality pulling us back into its cruel grasp.
“Right,” I mutter, peeling myself away from the warmth of the tree. I try to stand tall, to portray confidence, but my legs still tremble beneath my own weight—an echo of my fear.
As we begin to move, shadows flit among the trees, and every crack of a branch feels like an omen. Carter walks nearer, ready to catch me if I stumble, and I take solace in his close proximity. One foot forward becomes two, and soon we’re sprinting down the trail, hearts racing in synchrony, the sound of our breaths filling the air as we propel ourselves toward uncertainty.
The woods begin to thin as we approach the clearing, the faint glow of streetlights beckoning us back to civilization. My pulsequickens—not just from the exertion but from the impending confrontation with reality. I can almost feel Havoc’s presence in every flicker of light, each rush of wind through the leaves. He’s there, and I will not abandon him.
“What if he doesn’t wake up?” I ask, an unwelcome doubt rising in me again. “Or what if he does, but he’s lost everything?”
“If he has,” Carter replies, his voice firm, “then we remind him. We bring back the laughter, the courage, and all the things that make him who he is. You can’t give up on him just because there’s a chance he may not recognize what’s right in front of him.”
His words ignite a fire deep within me, rekindling the spirit that’s been dimmed by despair. “You’re right,” I exhale. “We have to try. For him, for ourselves.”
As we break free from the trees and onto the pavement, the world feels alive—each breath more potent than the last. We hop back on his bike and speed off, the vibrations from the engine awakening something inside of me as I hold onto him even tighter. The club lies ahead like a fortress bracing for war, and I know this battle will be unlike anything I've ever faced. But with my friends beside me, I feel a tiny glimmer of hope.
The ride to the club isn't long, but it feels like it. I cling to Carter like he's the anchor holding me down so I don't float away, even though right now that's all I want to do. Each touch feels like a betrayal to Havoc, even Crow, but in a situation like this, it's impossible to choose which one I want by my side. I want all of them; I want everything they bring to the table, different and alike. But right now, I want more than anything for Havoc to wake up.
Together, we stride towards the lit-up entrance, the heavy doors serving as a threshold between what once was and what we might reclaim. I may not have all the answers, but I have the will to fight and the realization that I'm not alone anymore. Andthat, more than anything else, fuels a spark within me—turning my panic into purpose as we step into the unknown.
Walking back into Club Mayhem, I put my mask back on to hide myself from prying eyes that follow me and Carter as we're led through the main floor toward the basement. At the doors, two Masked Mayhem members stand guard, and as soon as we're let inside, Crow stands at the bottom, and even though his mask is still covering his face, I can see the hint of a relieved smile just by looking into his eyes. Next to him, Red is standing there, a grim darkness swirling in his eyes as he glares at 13, and I can tell they have some shit they need to work out between them. So I run down the stairs and leap into Crow's arms, letting the tears finally fall freely. I bury my face into his chest as he hugs me tighter than he ever has, and it suddenly reminds me of the hugs I used to get from my foster brothers, and I'm briefly taken back in time to when all was good in the world because I had them both by my side. But that was then. Now, I have no clue where they are, and the sense of love and protection they made me feel is gone, replaced by the comfort from more strangers, but I'll take whatever I can get... especially right now.
