Page 19 of Beautiful Ruins
I scrubbed a hand over my face. Sadie was right. I was an arsehole. But I’d keep being the arsehole if it meant she was safe. She was still my weakness, and it was killing me. The one I couldn’t protect myself from, and despite that, all I wanted was to make sure nothing like this ever touched her life again.
But I was the one infecting it now. I was hurting her. Maybe that was what it would take to keep her away, and out of danger.
I had to let her hate me a while longer.
It was either that, or lose her for good.
I stalked backinside the clubhouse, and into the meeting room where Bear and Scout had already gathered. The air in the room was stale, the remnants of smoke and alcohol seeping through from the open bar room. I was ready to fight the first fucker who looked at me wrong.
The last thing I wanted to do was be there. I needed the open space, a long deserted road to chase away the anxiety and guilt building in my chest.
“Let’s get this over with,” I said, slumping into the seat opposite Bear and dragging a hand down my face as if that was enough to scrape off the previous twenty-four hours. Someone’s boot thumped a nervous rhythm against the floor. “I have more important shit to do.” Like drink myself into another stupor.
Bear’s gaze caught mine, and he scratched at his jaw, his fingers getting lost in his thick beard. “What was that all about?”
I shook my head. “Nothing.” It was all I could say, even if it was a lie.
Sadie had some nerve turning up there and throwing Logan’s words in my face. Still, maybe I’d gone too far. I should’ve gone after her. Yet, there I was, sulking like a child because it turned out, I hadn’t dealt with a damn thing.
“You sure about that?” Bear said, leaning back and crossing an ankle over a knee. “What’d the chief’s daughter have to say?”
“Can we just leave it be?” It wasn’t the time or place to discuss the bomb Sadie just strapped to my back.
He held his hands up, sniffing, as Scout shoved a mug in my direction. No amount of coffee was going to fix this hangover. Or the fact Sadie fucking Cooper was hellbent on destroying me for good.
That was a special kind of hell. It went from simmering to full boil and back again in two seconds flat. And every single fucking word between me and her lingered in my head like a funeral bell. I knew I’d crossed a line, but fuck it—she’d crossed hers, too.
The scent of her still clung to the back of my throat, like a sweet poison killing me slowly.
Scout nudged the mug closer with the back of his hand, his blue eyes wide with the innocence that somehow still clung to him. “It’ll be okay, VP.” Always the optimist.
Doubt he’d say that if he knew what was really going on. He was one of the biggest in the room, all lean muscle. But when it came to the hard stuff, he was still green. Some would even say he was one of the prettiest too—mostly women.
I shot him a look and pulled the mug to my lips. The caffeine barely burned away any of the fogginess inside my head.
Bear cleared his throat and drummed his fingers on the scratched-up table as he simultaneously tapped a rhythm on the timber leg with his boot like a one-man fucking band. “Well, before you bite my head off again, three of our bikes got torched last night.” My eyebrows shot up. That got my attention. “Down near the old mill. Stripped first.”
That old tension knotted up in my chest. At least that was something I could focus on.
I ran a hand through my hair, shaking loose the thoughts of Sadie. “Any idea who?”
The overhead fan creaked as a few seconds of silence descended on us.
“Locals, maybe,” Scout said, lifting a broad shoulder. “Or some smart-arse kids.” I loved his eagerness, his need to still prove he was worth something.
At least one of us still gave a shit about the club.
Me? I was walking the thin line, veering off course more than I should have.
Bear yawned, rubbing his right eye. “Don’t think it was kids.” He hadn’t slept much last night. Looked it, too. “That wasn’t just vandalism. It was a message.”
He wasn’t wrong, and I finally had something I could sink my teeth into. And fuck, I needed the distraction.
I nodded, taking another mouthful of now-lukewarm coffee. “Agreed. Kids wouldn’t be stupid enough. A rival, perhaps?”
“Maybe.” Bear lifted a shoulder. A fly buzzed around the rim of his coffee cup, but he didn’t bother to swat it away. “Take your pick. Any of them would be frothing at the mouth for more turf.”
“We can’t just point fingers without evidence to prove it,” I said. “That’d just start a war.”
