Page 146 of There's No Us Without You
Jesus, this thing has seen some shit in its years living in this hell hole. It’s been thrown up against the wall more times than I can count, ended up on its side numerous more times, and held my brother’s tears as we ate noodles for dinner for the tenth time in a row.
A couple minutes pass before Jenny walks over with a wooden tray in her hands, the teacups clinking against the saucers when she places the tray on the table.
With a smile, she hands me a cup and saucer filled with hot water and a tea bag.
There’s a small matching jug containing milk, so I snatch that up and tip the contents into the cup before stirring it with a spoon.
This is . . . weirdly comforting.
I’ve never had tea like this before.
With someone who actually gives a fuck about me.
I examine the small white cup, almost too small for my large hands. It’s old, with scratches on what was once gold trimming around the lip, and the decorative hand-painted flowers are dull and worn.
Does Eden like teacups? Aren’t these collector’s items, or some shit?
“So,” Jenny says, bringing her own cup to her lips. “Have you thought about how you’re going to tell your brother?”
Fucking Christ. Not this again.
Before I have a chance to tell her she needs to back off, Jenny holds a hand up and places her cup back on the saucer. “Before you bite my head off, hear me out. Please.”
Running my tongue over my top teeth, I shake my head. “Do I even have a choice?”
Shaking her head, she sighs. “Not really. Unfortunately.”
“Go on then,” I say before taking a sip of the scalding liquid in my cup, ignoring the pain as it burns my tongue and throat.
I’d stab myself in the leg with a butter knife just to avoid having this conversation.
Jenny clears her throat and presses her fingertips together, her hands resting on the table. “I suppose I just need to come out and say it.” Tears in her eyes, she searches my face. “Your father doesn’t have long left, Will. Every day he gets weaker. For starters, he’s sleeping more. And... well, he’s dying, sweetheart. No matter what your father has done, he still deserves a goodbye.”
He doesn’t deserve anything of the sort, but instead of losing my shit, I bite my tongue—literally.
I got used to that pain over the years.
Jenny searches my face, her brown eyes pulling down at the sides. “I know you don’t think he deserves anything, but maybe Tyler does. Give him the option of making his own decisions instead of making them for him.”
I rub my eyes and blow out a breath. “And if it sends him spiralling, what do I do? You weren’t around back then. You have no idea what it was like.”
With a warm hand, Jenny reaches over and covers mine. “You can’t save him if he doesn’t want to be saved. No-one can, Will. I promise you that much.”
All I can do is stare at the cup I’m spinning around on the saucer. Maybe she’s right. Maybe I can relieve myself of the burden of constantly trying to protect my brother. He is a grown man, after all.
He also has Eden to talk to now.
And Emerson.
Fuck, he even has me. I guess he always did—it just took me a couple of years to remember he went through the same shit I did.
It never occurred to me until now that maybe I’m the one holding on to the past because then I get to hold on to my anger. Without it, I don’t know who I am.
How fucked up is that?
“I suppose you’re right,” I say, tapping the side of my cup. “I’ll tell him.”
With a nod, Jenny smiles and settles into the chair to finish her hot drink. “I knew you’d make the right decision.”
