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I head for my car and get in.My stomach is in a knot. My chest is tight. I feel worse than I did before lunch.

But I can’t afford to fall apart. Not now. Not ever.

The late afternoon shoot is set at what’s supposed to look like a fancy spa. There’s a large Jacuzzi bubbling on the left with steam curling into the air. A cold plunge pool is on the right. The backdrop is a spa-type thing, all polished wood and soft lighting. Wooden benches surround the pools on three sides.

Luckily, the set is warm, so when Rich suggests I hit the Jacuzzi shirtless, I only roll my eyes and toss my shirt to him. I tug a towel around my waist and start toward the water.

“Actually,” Rich says, stopping me. “I want you on the bench here. If you want in the Jacuzzi, you’ve got to do the Compatibility Plunge first.”

I sigh.

The producers are calling it the Compatibility Plunge. Cute. Rich hands me a stack of cards with messy handwriting. Thegirls wrote answers to personal prompts. I’m supposed to guess who said what.

If I guess right, we get in the hot tub together. If I guess wrong, the girl takes a plunge in the freezing water and has to answer a tough question on camera.

It’s classic reality show drama. I get it. It’s entertaining. But still, I take a breath and try to center myself.

The girls start coming out one by one, all wrapped in identical white silk robes. Bare legs, nervous smiles. I spot Wren clutching her sash like it personally offended her. She’s already glaring at the setup like she’s seconds away from dismantling the entire production with sheer force of will.

My mouth goes dry. I’ve seen what’s under that robe before. Bathing suits, beach days on Lake Lanier. But something feels different this time. Maybe it’s because I hadn’t kissed her then. Those were simpler times.

Now, I can’t stop thinking about how soft her lips felt against mine. I shift slightly on the bench, trying to get my head in the game.

Rich waves a cue card at me. “Let’s go, Romeo.”

Right. Showtime.

I’m unraveling. Slowly, silently. Because if I fall apart now, if I admit I care, then I’ve already lost.

And I can’t stand for that.

fifteen

RYAN

I standand open my arms, gesturing to the girls. “Ladies, welcome.”

I pause and glance at Rich, who’s standing off camera. He makes an encouraging face.

I continue. “This is a little adventure we like to call the Compatibility Plunge. I have here…” I hold up the index cards. “The answers to the questions you wrote down earlier. If I can guess which one of you wrote the quote on this card, then you and I spend some quality time together in the hot tub.

“If not, you walk straight to that pool over there and take a cold plunge. After you dunk your head under and come up for air, I’ll ask you a question.”

I smile, trying to lighten the mood. “The goal tonight is to give me a better idea of who I’m compatible with. First week, I got rid of Trinity right away because she didn’t share the same values. I knew we were never going to be romantic.

“This week, I’ve spent a little more time with all of you. I’m looking forward to seeing whether we’re actually compatible.”

“Are you ready to go?”

The girls applaud lightly, but no one looks thrilled. I can’t say I blame them. This setup is borderline insane.

I glance at Wren. She has one brow cocked while she stares off into the distance. I don’t know what she’s thinking, but I’d bet good money it’s something foul about me.

“All right. Let’s begin.”

I brandish the cards and read the first one aloud. “What’s your biggest fear in a relationship?” I pause. “This one says, ‘Getting ghosted again.’”

I scan the group, considering. No one’s mentioned being ghosted before, so I go out on a limb. “Daisy.”