Page 130 of Say Yes to the Nemesis
“Neither does forcing something that isn’t there.”
But even as I say it, I know it’s a lie. What’s between Wren and me isn’t forced. If anything, I’ve been fighting it since the moment she walked into that first rose ceremony wearing that punk rock outfit and glaring at me like I’d personally offended her.
“So you’re saying there’s nothing there?” Rich presses. “No feelings developing?”
I stare at him for a long moment. “I’m saying that if there were feelings developing, they’d be private. Between me and her. Not entertainment for people sitting on their couches eating popcorn.”
“Fair enough.” He makes a note on his pad. “But you have to admit, the dynamic between you two is compelling. The way you challenge each other, the banter, the obvious attraction.”
“Obvious?”
“Come on, Ryan. I’ve watched the footage. The way you look at her when you think no one’s watching. The way she responds to you. It’s electric.”
My chest tightens. If it’s that obvious to the producers, who else can see it? Jay’s going to watch this show when it airs. He’s going to see every glance, every touch, every moment I’ve failed to hide how I feel about his sister.
“Like I said,” I tell Rich. “She drives me insane.”
“The kind of insane you’d miss if it was gone?”
The question catches me off guard. Because the answer is yes, absolutely, I would miss her if she was gone. I’d miss her sarcasm and her stubbornness and the way she challenges everything I say. I’d miss the way she looks at me when she thinks I’m being ridiculous. I’d miss the sound of her laugh when I actually manage to say something funny.
I’d miss all of it.
But I’m not about to tell Rich that.
“We’re almost done here,” he says, closing his notebook. “Just one more question. If you had to choose right now, today, who would get your final rose?”
My heart starts pounding. “It’s too early for that.”
“Hypothetically.”
“I don’t deal in hypotheticals.”
“Ryan.” His voice gets sharper, more insistent. “The audience needs to see that you’re taking this seriously. That you’re genuinely looking for love, not just going through the motions.”
I am taking it seriously. More seriously than I’ve ever taken anything in my life. But the person I’m taking seriously isn’t someone I can talk about in this room, with these cameras rolling and these producers hanging on every word.
“I’m here to find my person,” I say finally. “When I do, everyone will know.”
Rich nods, seemingly satisfied with that nonanswer. “Great. I think we got what we need.”
I stand up to leave, but he stops me with one more question.
“Off the record,” he says. “How much trouble are you in?”
I pause with my hand on the door handle. “What do you mean?”
“With Jay. Wren’s his sister, right? How crazy is he going to go when he finds out that you’ve been…talkingto her? Are we going to have to call the cops?”
His tone suggests he would very much like to get that on film. The fact that he knows about my relationship with Wren, that the producers all know, makes my stomach drop. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Rich smiles. “Sure you don’t. But Ryan? When this all comes out, and it will come out, make sure you’re ready for the fallout. Because it’s going to be big.”
I leave the confessional feeling like I’ve been run over by a truck. The producers know about Wren and me. They’re probably planning to use it as their big, dramatic twist, the moment that’ll have viewers glued to their screens.
Jay… fuck, Jay’s going to lose his mind.
I came into this room thinking I could keep lying. That I could spin some charming soundbites and walk out clean. But I can’t. Not anymore. I’ve already chosen her. The only question now is, what’s that choice going to cost me?
