Page 208 of When We Fall: Part One
“Keep breathing. Gentle. In and out. You’re OK. Whatever was happening is over now. You’re going to be OK. You know why?” Anson asked, his words soft and gentle. “Because you’re a fucking fighter, E. The best of the best. You got this, man. Believe me?”
Ethan nodded wordlessly, tears on his cheeks. His breathing had slowed significantly.
“I-I don’t like lemon,” he whispered again.
Anson offered him his hand. “Spit.”
Ethan spat the contents of his mouth into Anson’s hand.
“I’m going to Rosalie out of here and back to the stage. She has to perform with a group. When this is over, we will go out and have a drink, dance, and celebrate for her. You can sit backstage if you want. I’ll set everything up for you.”
“I-I’d like that,” Ethan whispered.
“Perfect. Fox, bring him backstage, OK?” Anson looked to Fox.
Fox nodded wordlessly. Anson got to his feet and approached me before holding his hand out to Enzo. Enzo opened his handfor him, and Anson dropped what appeared to be three yellow candies onto his palm.
“Warheads,” Anson said softly. “Lemon. The sour shocks the system and pulls people out of panic. I’ve carried them on me since I learned Rosalie panics sometimes. Maybe you should get some.”
He didn’t wait for Enzo to answer. Instead, he took me by the hand and led me out of the bathroom and backstage.
“Anson, what you did?—”
“Shh. It needed to be done. I can’t let your dreams go to waste because he struggles. That’s his struggle, LeeLee. It can’t be yours. It sounds harsh, but he needs to be the one to work on it. You can’t save him all the time.”
Tears prickled my eyes.
“I know, but it hurts me.”
“I know, darling. I know it does, but sometimes, he needs to deal on his own. Or with the guys. He won’t hate you for it. The guy is head over heels for you. I promise you that.”
I nodded, my throat tight. I knew Ethan was ride-or-die for me. I was for him, too, so leaving him when he needed me was hard.
Anson cradled my cheek for a moment before walking away. I watched as he set up a spot for Ethan and Fox to sit for the next part of the program.
“I’m sorry,” Ethan’s soft voice carried out as Fox walked in with him. Ethan’s eyes were rimmed in red, and I could tell he was high. He’d probably escaped to the bathroom to give himself his sugar to hold off his attack.
“It’s OK,” I murmured, squeezing his hand.
“I love you,” he said, his voice soft.
“I love you, too. Anson has a spot set up for you guys. You’ll be able to see everything.” I glanced from Fox, who gave me a sad smile, back to Ethan. “Are you OK?”
“Y-Yeah. I’m fine. I’m just… high.”
I sighed and backed away. “I have to go, but please, just…”
I didn’t know how to finish the sentence, so I left Fox to handle Ethan, even though everything within me wanted to rush back, hold him, and tell him how much I loved him.
I didn’t, though.
Because, as I was fast learning, the show must go on.
SIXTY-FIVE
ANSON
Rosalie was absolutely amazing. She performed another song, a solo without me, and that was it. If people weren’t discussing her talent before, they certainly would be now.
