Page 207 of Papa's Bébé
Okay, she could see how that sounded a bit insulting, but it really felt like he was coming at her from left field.
“I’m saying that you weren’t talking like this a couple of days ago. I don’t get what changed.”
“What changed is that you could have died last night.” There was a starkness in his voice that hit her hard. It burrowed its way into her stomach and took hold.
She could have died. He could have died. And her babies.
Maya was trying her best to push that deep because otherwise she might be completely overwhelmed. She had to keep functioning and it was difficult with how much she wanted to bury her head in the sand and just let someone else take over.
Because she didn’t know what to do with the knowledge that Vince was trying to kill her. Before, he was a threat, but not a deadly one. The threat to her father . . . well, that hadn’t even seemed that real.
Now. It was all very real.
“And I would have lost my chance to be happy because I thought that wasn’t what I wanted. Because I convinced myselfthat the life I already led was the only one that suited me. So fucking stupid. The truth, as much as I don’t want to admit it, is that I was scared to acknowledge my feelings for you, my need, because I don’t like feeling that way about anyone. Relying on anyone. I don’t like letting people close.”
She sucked in a deep breath. “We have something in common.”
“We do. For similar reasons. I need to tell you something.”
“All right,” she whispered, wondering what he was going to tell her. He wasn’t a person to talk much about himself. She’d gotten bits and pieces but nothing more.
“Both of my parents are dead.”
Um, right. He’d already told her that. But she nodded anyway, waiting for what he had to say.
“I told you that they died in an accident, but that wasn’t the full truth. That’s just something I tell people because it’s easier.”
Okay, she didn’t like that. She wasn’t just people.
No, she wanted to be more. She wanted to believe in what he was saying about wanting more with her. However, there was a part of her that was having trouble believing that it was real.
“There was a car accident, but that’s not how they both died. My papa was driving too fast for the conditions. We’d been on at him to get his eyes tested, but he thought he had perfect vision. He miscalculated a turn and took it too fast. The crash left my papa injured but all right. However, my maman was left in a coma, fighting for her life. She had brain damage and the doctors warned us that it wasn’t likely that she would survive.”
“Oh my God,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
“My father didn’t take it well. When I finally got him to agree to take her off life support, he collapsed. I should have known . . . should have realized that he shouldn’t be left alone.”
She had a terrible feeling that she knew where this was going. And she wasn’t sure whether she wanted to hear what he had to say.
“I found him several hours later at their house. He shot himself.”
“Oh, Matthieu. I’m so sorry.” She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him.
He stood and picked her up in his arms, then he sat on the bed with her on his lap. Her legs were straddling his hips. She could feel herself blushing.
Now isn’t the time to get turned on.
“That must have been terrible for you.” She couldn’t even think of what to say to him. She was so crap at this.
“It was. I was so angry at him. But I was even more angry at myself for not realizing, for not doing something. I know I was an adult, but I still needed him.”
Hesitantly, she cupped his face between her hands. “I’m not the best person at knowing what to say in situations like this, but it wasn’t your fault. You lost your mom too. He should have known how upset you would be.”
She knew it was wrong to feel mad at his dad, but she couldn’t stop that feeling from welling up.
If his dad was here now, she’d probably let him know exactly what she thought of him.
Easy. His dad is gone. He’s in pain. The last thing he needs is you telling him how angry you are at his dad.
