Page 150 of Papa's Bébé
“That came out sounding wrong,” he said. “What I meant to say is that you are perfect. Beautiful and brave and your body doesn’t need to change at all. No more giving yourself tiny amounts of food to eat, understand? I want you to eat properly. You’re busy moving around all day. You need proper fuel or you’ll get ill.”
He was right. She knew it. It was just that sometimes her stepmother’s voice got into her head and she couldn’t get it out.
“Okay.”
“That’s my good girl,” he praised her.
Damn. She liked being called a good girl. She liked it way too much.
“But I still think it’s crazy to cut up grapes for me,” she told him. “Just like it’s kind of crazy to own this land and not live on it.”
“I don’t know. There’s something about all of the untouched beauty of it.”
“Well, that’s true. But I really would love waking up in the morning and opening the curtains to this. Sitting out on a porch with a cup of coffee and listening to the birds. Or toMarshmallow farting.” She grinned. “But you’re right, maybe it should stay pristine and beautiful.”
“Yeah, maybe,” he murmured with a strange look on his face.
“Do you ever miss France?” she asked. “Do you ever go home?”
“Actually, I haven’t been home in a long, long time. I think I would prefer to forget that I ever lived there.”
She bit down on her tongue to stop herself from asking any more questions. Because he really didn’t sound like he wanted to talk about this anymore.
And Maya knew better than anyone what it was like to have a painful past that you’d rather forget.
31
“This has been such a great day,” Maya said to him as they drove home. “But do you know what would make it even better?”
Matthieu took his eyes off the road to glance over at her. Being out in nature suited her. He hadn’t been sure that she’d like it. But her face was glowing and her eyes sparkled. It was like she was a different person.
As though she’d been able to pull herself out from under the dark cloud of all her worries and just live free for a while.
Be happy.
He wished he could make it so she could be like that all the time. To have no fears or worries.
You could if you took over for her.
If he made all the decisions and she just got to embrace her Little.
But he didn’t know if she was a Little. Just because she wore cute pajamas and slept with a stuffed toy was not a full indication that she was a Little.
And even if she was, she wasn’t his Little.
But, damn it, he could totally see that picture she’d painted with her words. Waking up in a log cabin to all this beauty. And then turning away from Maya, who would be in his bed, and opening the curtains to see the beauty outside.
Yeah. He could absolutely see that being his life. But he needed to push those thoughts from his head. Because that wasn’t his future.
Even though it felt like Maya belonged in his bed.
She seemed so relaxed right now. She was talking to him far more easily. He liked it.
A lot.
“What’s that?”
“Ice cream!” She threw her hands into the air and Dougie barked in agreement.
