Page 117 of The Last Dance You Saved
I burst out of the hallway, demanding to know what was going on, but I knew the answer before Ted’s gaze drifted in his direction.
Because I felt him. Felt every single fiber of his being vibrating toward me.
Rafe Marquess sat at my bar with a glass of my bourbon in his hand and the heat of his stare scorching me. Marking me. Reminding me of what it felt like to be taken by him. To be made his.
The numbness that the kindness of our town had threatened to break through tore back further until it felt like I might just lose it altogether. Until it might leave me falling apart with too many emotions instead of too few.
When Rafe rose and started toward me, he looked like a mountain lion stalking his prey, and I didn’t know what he’d do when he caught me. Would he punish me for failing him and his daughter or devour me with kisses? Either way, he had something planned for me, and I wasn’t sure I’d survive it. Wasn’t even sure I wanted to if it meant he’d walk out of this town when he was through with goodbye on his lips.
“Did you do this?” I demanded with a wave toward the empty stage and was awed to find my voice sounded sure and steady when I was really shaking from head to toe.
“Don’t get your panties in a wad, Tennessee.” Rafe tossed my own words from that first night at the piano bar back at me as he crossed the room to me. “I needed silence to think. To find a way to put everything back to rights.”
My foolish heart slammed hard against my rib cage with a wave of unexpected hope I tried to shove back into the box it had escaped.
Eyes watched us with the same anticipation of a new season of their favorite reality show. The town would have more to gossip about tomorrow morning at Tillie’s than just the blood that had been cleaned from my office.
When Rafe was close enough to make out my face in the darkness of the bar, he let out a guttural sound of protest, and rage filled those chocolate depths.
“Goddamn him,” he hissed, fingers gently stroking my bruised, swollen cheek. His voice turned dark and deadly. “I’ll kill him for marking you. For touching my daughter.”
“Life in prison will be worse than death for him. An apt punishment.”
Next thing I knew, he’d hauled me to his chest and wrapped his arms around me. He held me so tight I thought I’d be wedged permanently to him. For two seconds, I savored his warmth, the smell of him, the zapping energy that burst into life whenever we touched.
But when he said, “Thank you for saving my daughter’s life,” and every syllable was loaded with deep gratitude, I froze.
Gratitude was the last thing I deserved. “She saved herself. I was just there to watch,” I told him, fighting the horrible feelings of ineptitude and regret that tried to drag me under.
Rafe leaned back, searching my face, my eyes, my soul. “She told me what happened, Sadie. She told me how you kept your cool, how you kept putting yourself between her and danger, and how you pulled the trigger when it counted most. I want to strangle you for risking yourself and kiss you for doing so in order to protect Fallon.”
Every word he spoke held a volume of tortured emotions I recognized. He blamed himself. Which was ridiculous…wasn’t it? But then again, was his guilt any more ridiculous than mine? Could either of us really have done something different to change what had happened?
The last vestiges of the numbness that had tried to protect me splintered and disappeared, leaving behind a raw spot that burned from the inside out. I’d spent three years kicking myself for what I saw as my failures with Mila, and I would have added years more to it after the failure of today. But maybe holding on to it was just keeping me from fully healing. Maybe the damage that was clinging to my soul had nothing to do with Chainsaw or Adam. Maybe I’d done this to myself because I wasn’t willing to forgive myself for simply being human.
My lungs seized, my heart stopped, and the world tilted as emotions flowed over and around me like a pint being filled. It was going to foam over any second if I didn’t tip it right, if I didn’t shut off the tap at just the exact moment. I’d lose control. Lose it all.
I needed air. Space. I struggled against Rafe’s arms, but he only held on tighter.
“Don’t run,” he demanded. “Scream. Yell. Throw my idiotic behavior in my face. But don’t run.”
“I can’t… I need to breathe,” I said, pushing against his chest.
He dropped his mouth close to my ear, lowering his voice so the rest of the room couldn’t hear him as he said, “I’m not letting you go, Tennessee. You’re mine. Did you forget so quickly what that means? I’ll happily remind you. Happily show you right here and right now in a way that will make the faces of the town gossips blush.”
Those words, his tone, sent molten heat through my veins, pooling low in my stomach. Feelings I thought I’d never have again, not after he’d sent me away. Not after I’d failed to protect his daughter and reminded myself of how much failing hurt. I’d almost convinced myself he’d been right to say goodbye. I’d been prepared for it, been prepared for him to sweep in, take Fallon, and disappear from my life.
But now, tucked up next to him, everything I’d wanted when I’d left California came flooding in behind the guilt and hurt, but it brought fear as well. It was different than what I’d felt facing Adam and Theresa. This was fear of the lonely, empty hole that would reside in my heart if he sent me away again. Feeling it, feeling that hollowness on the edges of my peripheral, reminded me I was angry with him for having shoved me out of his life with such ease.
I glared up at him and shoved a finger into his chest. “You told me it was over. You forced me out of your life. If anyone has forgotten the words we said, the things we did, it’s you.”
“How else could I get you to go?” He shook his head, remorse drifting through those brown depths. “I was wrong. I thought sending you both away was the best way to protect you. But nothing will ever be right when we’re not together. I left you wide open, practically dared them to come after you. From the moment you boarded the plane, I was trying to find a way to apologize, to earn your trust back, to prove I’d never be an idiot again. You belong at my side. I belong at yours. End of story.”
Every muscle in my body went lax, love crashing through me at the sweetness of his words. It soothed the regret and failure and hurt that had burned through me. He loved me. I loved him. Was that enough to overcome everything else? “You ignored me for four days. Never once called me or picked up when I called you.”
Instead of sounding sure and angry, it came out sounding like a pout, even to my own ears, and he smirked. Those goddamn gorgeous lips tilted up in that way that made my heart skip beats and my insides ache in a beautiful instead of ugly way.
“I did. Because I knew if I heard your voice, I’d come running after you. But I’m man enough to admit when I was wrong. Damn wrong. I love you, and you love me. Your mama said everything else is just icing on the cake or rotten eggs, and she’s right. This…” His arms tightened around me, and his lips brushed my forehead. “Us… It’s all that matters.”
