“You’re my favorite thing. My favorite memory. My favorite gift. My favorite person,” she said quietly.
I could no longer hold the tears back. I didn’t know how to let her go. But I’d have to because it wasn’t always the cowboy who ran away.
Sometimes, it was the golden-haloed woman with a future so bright the gods had to be jealous.
That was my McKenna.
And tomorrow, she’d be gone.
No longer mine, but the world’s instead.
CHAPTERONE
MCKENNA
YOU ALL OVER ME
“Now every breath of air I breathe reminds me of then.”
Performed by Taylor Swift with Maren Morris
Written by Carusoe / Swift
TEN YEARS LATER
Bouncingon my bed woke me. I forced my eyes open and then slammed them shut upon seeing Sally’s glowing face. It was too early for this kind of over-the-top happiness.
“Happy birthday, McKenna!” she practically screamed, forcing me to look at her again.
I groaned and tried to bury my head under the covers, but my roommate wouldn’t let me. Instead, she ripped the blankets back with surprisingly strong hands and shoved a heavy present at me. Her large, mahogany eyes twinkled in her light-brown face as her pink-tipped waves swung around her sharply defined cheeks and chin.
I hated birthdays, while Sally was from a family who celebrated them like they were a bigger deal than Christmas. In the three years I’d been living with her, she’d made sure I had cake, presents, and whatever I wanted for dinner. Last year, she’d even thrown a surprise party for me at the nurses' station. I’d wanted to run as soon as I’d turned the corner, and I’d made her promise never to do it again.
Growing up, my birthdays had been a painful reminder of what had gone wrong in Mama’s life, and she’d done everything to make sure her worst day would also be mine. Only one person besides Sally had ever tried to make this day something different.
I pushed aside the memories that threatened to weigh me down and groused without any real heat, “It’s too early for presents and celebrations, Sal.”
“Shut up and open it!” she said, ignoring my grumpiness and shoving the box at me with her wide smile fixed permanently in place.
I sat up, and my naturally blonde hair tumbled around me in knots. I’d regret going to bed with it wet, but I’d been exhausted after my twelve-hour shift at the hospital had turned into a sixteen-hour one. I’d barely been able to shower, let alone worry about my hair.
I pulled the bulky gift onto my lap and shot Sally a frown. “I hope you didn’t do something stupid, like spend some of your car money on me. I don’t want to be the reason you can’t get it in January!”
She flicked my shoulder. “Just open it and stop being ridiculous.”
I slowly undid the ribbon and pulled off the lid. Inside was a DVD collection ofBuffy the Vampire Slayer. Every season. I swallowed hard. The DVDs weren’t new, but they still had to have cost her a pretty penny to get the entire set. With both of us barely scraping by due to the enormous college debt resting on our shoulders, this wasn’t a little gift.
Tears hit my eyes for real, but I refused to let them out, like I’d learned to do early in life by biting my cheek and clenching my nails into my palms. But my voice was still clogged with emotions when I choked out, “Dang it, Sal.”
She hugged me to her, and I did my best not to stiffen, letting my head land briefly on her shoulder.
“Now, you’ll always have Buffy when you need her,” she said softly.
“I need her less these days because I have you,” I responded. She was the best female friend I’d ever had. I’d say she was my best friend ever, but there was a teeny-tiny place inside my heart that knew it would be a lie. But I wouldn’t hear from him today. I’d shoved him out of my life for a dream?a mirage?that had disappeared in the shimmer of the hot sun.
My gut twisted.
I couldn’t think of that today. Of him. Of my mistakes.