Page 73 of Crossed By the Stars
“We do this from time to time with the ones we love,” he said, and in his tone, I heard a sort of apology and acceptance, as if losing me would be worse than accepting Jada. My heart leaped.
“She’s unaccustomed to anyone loving her that much,” I said honestly.
Emotions seemed to fill the line as we both took that in. Then, he said teasingly, “I have one word for you.” I could almost see the twinkle in his eye even when he was thousands of miles away.
“Yeah?”
“Grovel.”
We both laughed before it turned serious again.
“Dax…I… This is not going to be easy for me,” he said quietly.
“I know. I’ve tried for over a decade to get rid of the feelings I have for her. I tried because I didn’t want to hurt you. Us.Éclair.” I swallowed hard. “But denying her is like denying myself. I can’t do it anymore. More importantly, I can’t do it to her. She deserves someone willing to give up everything just for her.”
His words held tears when he spoke again, so many emotions pouring over the phone. “I’m proud of the man you are, Dax. I hope you know that. Please be safe. Come see us. Soon. Yourmamanand I both miss you.”
“I will…we will,” I told him, and he didn’t even argue against it.
We hung up, and I felt not quite relieved but as if the rift that could have occurred between us was not as insurmountable as it had appeared.Love did that. A father’s true love for a child. I’d brought the devil to the door, and he’d still opened it.
It made me wonder again about Tsuyoshi Mori and if he was truly behind these threats. He’d protected Jada for years even when she’d done everything she could to hurt and humiliate him. Did he love her enough to see past it all? His cold tone in the sedan and the distant “musume” he called her seemed to contradict it.
I went in search of Cillian and the others. I needed to know who’d given us up. We needed to know who was coming after her. The Matsudas inviting her to their house was a flashing neon warning sign.
As I entered the kitchen, Cillian was just hanging up with Reinard.
“You figure out who gave us up?” I asked with a growl.
“There’s no way it’s any of the guys here, Dax. None. Not only did they have no opportunity, but all of their communication is monitored.”
“Terrence went into town for fast food.”
Cillian glowered. “I’ve worked with Terrence since our Ranger days. He’s not the leak.”
“Is there another way they found us? Through the phones?” I asked with a chin in the direction of his burner.
Cillian’s brows furrowed together. “The burners are clean. It would have to be on Reinard’s end.”
“Reinard?”
Cillian’s face grew even darker. “No.”
“Rana didn’t think anyone on her team could be the leak either, but Mori has obviously gotten to all of you somehow. Figure it out.”
Cillian stormed out, and I turned my energy to making lunch so I wouldn’t give in to the anxiety and concern eating at me, so I wouldn’t run into the library and force Jada to see things my way. That was what every other man in her life had done to her. I wouldn’t be them.
At lunch, I sent Mike to the library with a tray of food so she knew I was respecting her wishes. But as the day started to disappear into another cold, autumn evening, I worried that she wasn’t ever going to come out.Papahad said to grovel, but I wasn’t a groveler by nature. I apologized for my mistakes with heartfelt sincerity, and then it was up to the other person to forgive or not. I’d given her the time she’d requested to consider my apology. But I wondered if instead of giving her space, I needed to prove to her that I was still there. That I would fight everyone, including her, to stay at her side.
Just as I was getting ready to knock on the library door, it opened, and she emerged.
Instead of being angry that I was standing there, ready to invade when she’d asked me to stand down, Jada laughed. “I’m actually impressed you stayed away this long.”
I grinned. “It’s been pretty hard. Youshouldbe impressed.”
Her eyes strolled my body, taking in the part of me that was almost always hard around her, and my smile widened.
“You’re impossible,” she said, rolling her eyes.
