Page 14 of Crossed By the Stars
“How did I not know this?” I asked, a little stunned.
“To be fair, how much do you know about your father at all?” he returned.
It was painfully true. I knew nothing ofOtosan’spast. I barely knew anything of his present. I knew my paternal grandparents had died before I was born and that his marriage to my mother, eight years younger than him, had been arranged. I knew that I’d been shuffled off to the United States to be raised by my maternal grandmother because there was never time in my parents’ world for a child. At fifteen, I’d found out that my father was the head of an international crime syndicate that made the Yakuza look small. That was pretty much the extent of my factual knowledge of Tsuyoshi Mori.
The tension that had followed me home from New York continued to grow and caused me to do something I hadn’t done in months. I poured myself a second glass of alcohol and all but swallowed it whole.
The wine hit me hard, making me light-headed due to the little food I’d had all day and my diminished alcohol tolerance. I closed my eyes against the spin of the room, and yet I could still feel Dax’s gaze on me, assessing me. I was tired of being assessed by men, even if it was by one who I secretly wished would tear my clothes off and screw me into forgetfulness.
That was the old Jada.
That was the person I’d sworn I’d left behind when I’d emerged from the hospital in New London and moved in with Violet. I wouldn’t let that Jada back out to ruin everything Violet and I had built. The old Jada was the one who let people down, who risked her friends…and her family. I wouldn’t become her again.
Dax
JUST SAY YES
“I won't be ok and I won't pretend I am,
So just tell me today and take my hand.”
Performed by Snow Patrol
Written by Connolly / Lee / Lightbody / Quinn / Simpson
We’d gone through the entire firstbottleof wine before the appetizers had been removed and the salads had arrived. I knew it wasn’t how Jada lived anymore. She’d all but disappeared from the circle of wealth and privilege we’d spent our twenties partying with as we followed the drip of diamonds and dollars from Monte Carlo to Rio de Janeiro, from Vail to New York, and back to Europe. While Jada had removed herself from the crowd, I hadn’t. If anything, I’d joined the whirl of partying even more over the last two years, andPapahad noticed.
Just last week, he’d called me into his office with a frown and questions about my future. In some ways, it reminded me of the meeting Jada just had with her father. Ultimatums tossed out. Except, my father’s had been done out of an abundance of love, while her father’s had been cold and threatening.
Jada closed her eyes, and when she swayed slightly while still seated, I knew we needed more food and less alcohol. Ilan pursed his lips when I declined the next bottle of wine he brought and asked for seltzer water instead.
When he disappeared,I moved closer to Jada along the bench seat and tilted my head so that my mouth was a mere breath away from hers, pink lips tempting me to devour her. In a booth. In a display I rarely did in public.
As my knee skimmed hers, her eyes popped open, drifting to my lips and back up. My chest ached. My dick ached. This was every reason I avoided Jada. I couldn’t trust the control I prided myself on to remain in place. And I was painfully aware of what came of falling for a Mori.
“Talk to me,” I said, trying to keep the demand from my voice that would only end in her defense mechanisms crashing down around me.
“What do you want me to say?” she asked with a careless shrug. “You heard him.”
“Do you believe it? That it isn’t him?”
“Otosandoesn’t lie. He doesn’t need to.”
I considered her comment. It was actually scarier in many ways to think the threats weren’t coming from him. It was always better to know your enemy in order to counter their strategies with your own.
After the incident in New London, Jada had told Dawson her father had washed his hands of her, kicked her from all of his residences, and commanded the entireKyodainato leave her and Dawson alone. He’d dumped the entire debacle at Ken’Ichi Matsuda’s feet and walked away from it without a look back. I wasn’t sorry that Matsuda had been killed in the process. He’d been evil. Jada had feared and hated him long before she’d been forced into an engagement with him.
“I don’t want to talk about it anymore,” she said as if she could hear my thoughts.
I let her have her way as Ilan placed the next course in front of us, even when I wasn’t done with the topic. While we ate, we turned to safer conversations: her work, mine, the new productsForce de la Violettewas coming out with, the fact that they were going to have to move into larger facilities to keep up with demand, and my father’s newest line of clothes that was taking the world by storm.
“He wants me to take a more active role inÉclair,” I told her.
Jada’s lips quirked. “He finally got tired of paying you to gallivant around the globe with Benita and the vampires?”
I scoffed, “I haven’t usedPapa’smoney in years. Dawson and I make more than enough for me to live any way I please.”
But I didn’t deny the fact that I’d been spending time with Benita or the fact that her circle was vampire-like. The entire group of trust-fund babies floated from one major high-society event and one season to the next in rounds of endless partying. Sleeping during the day, carousing at night. I’d grown tired of it sooner than most. Bone weary. It was why I’d originally gone into boat racing and yacht building with Dawson years ago. I’d wanted to actuallydosomething that proved I was more thanÉtienneArmaud’s son. But after the incident in New London, I’d let myself sink back into Benita’s world in order to forget what I couldn’t have. I’d let myself be drawn into Benita’s bed to escape my father’s secrets and the even larger wedge the words had driven between Jada and me without her even knowing it.
