Page 60 of Dark Shaman: The Lost Treasure
When the conversation returned to his travels, she watched the way his hands moved when he spoke of places he'd been. The subtle tension in his shoulders that never quite eased, as if he were ready to flee on a moment's notice. The way his voice softened when speaking of beauty he'd witnessed, like a sunrise over the Sahara or storms rolling across the Black Sea.
She envied him for seeing the world, for having traveled and mingled with so many people, but she also wondered what he wasn't saying.
When her friends shifted to debate whether modern technology helped or hindered genuine human connection, Elias had gone quiet.
"Are you tired?" she asked quietly.
He turned to her, and for a moment, his careful control slipped. She saw loneliness there, deep and aching, before he smiled. "A little. I don't remember talking so much in years. Besides, sometimes it's better to listen. You can learn more that way."
She smiled. "The only one who's been quiet throughout dinner was Tula, so I guess she learned a lot this evening."
"There were many small silences in between your words."
Was he trying to give her a compliment? She never said no to those.
"And what did they tell you?"
"That you're not only stunningly beautiful but also smart and knowledgeable, and you are bravely making the best of a difficult situation. You've found ways to maintain sanity and dignity despite your circumstances, and that you're hungry for something indefinable—not just novelty but also meaning."
His perception was unsettling and accurate, but then she should have expected that from a shaman.
Tamira felt exposed, as if he'd peered directly into her soul. "And what do you hunger for, Elias?"
The question hung between them, loaded with possibilities. Around them, the dinner conversation continued, but Tamira felt caught in a bubble of intimacy with this incredibly compelling man.
"Fulfillment," he said after a long moment. "The knowledge that I have fulfilled my duties and haven't failed those who depend on me."
Tamira felt her heart constrict.
Did Elias have a wife and children somewhere that Navuh had torn him away from?
"Who are those people who depend on you?" she asked.
He swallowed hard. "They are no longer on this plane of existence, and my sacred duty is to carry the torch and not let them be forgotten." He closed his eyes. "Hard to do from this place."
She felt his pain. Her people were dead as well, long gone, but not forgotten.
"You can write about them," she suggested. "Perhaps Lady Areana can arrange the publishing of your memoir. As long as you don't mention this place, it might be possible."
He took her hand, and she was surprised at how smooth his skin was for someone who gardened as much as he did. "You are very sweet, Tamira, but writing about my lost people will not count toward fulfilling my duty to them."
"Then what will?"
His eyes clouded. "When you've touched the infinite, ordinary existence feels hollow. But the infinite can't be grasped, only glimpsed. So, we return to the mundane world carrying echoes of transcendence that make normal life feel like exile."
She had no idea what he was talking about, but it sounded too profound to be a mere deflection. Perhaps she just wasn't smartenough to understand what he was trying to say. She understood the sentiment, though. The sense of being forever displaced, of belonging neither to the world left behind nor the one currently inhabited.
"Perhaps exile shared becomes homecoming," she said.
"Perhaps it does," he whispered.
"What are you and Elias whispering about over there?" Rolenna asked, piercing their bubble of intimacy.
Tamira turned back to the group, noting how they were watching her interaction with Elias with knowing smiles. "I said that shared experiences create their own form of belonging. Like us…"
She was interrupted by the doors opening and Lady Areana entering the dining room. She wore white, as she often did, the color making her pale beauty seem almost translucent.
Everyone rose to their feet, including Elias, who followed their lead and bowed.
