“With a long friendship to build on, we could do worse, sweetheart.” He cups my cheek. “But this isn’t about us; it’s about all the lives we’ll be saving.”
That’s the one truth I can’t argue against. Bram needs to nominate someone for the Council quickly to compete against Mathias. Of all Bram’s allies, Lucan has one of the better claims to a seat through his uncle.
Even if Ice genuinely loves me, and God knows I love him, nothing can change the fact that magickind needs me to mate with the next wizard who occupies MacKinnett’s seat. It was a fairy tale to think otherwise.
The reality fills me with a helpless rage.
“Sabelle.” Lucan cups my face in his hands, and the sting of his warmth against my cheeks zips my gaze up to his blue, blue eyes. “I will be good to you. Always.”
Lucan leans closer, erasing half the space between us, his lids half-closed. He wants to kiss me. He’s waiting for a sign from me.
I swallow. Could I truly mate with Lucan? Share intimacies with him when I’m no longer focused on providing healing energy?
Clutching his forearms, I gulp and raise my chin a fraction, tilting my face toward his. Could I let myself be with him? Could I honestly give myself to Lucan as a mate?
I need to know if I can make this work—if duty will be enough since love isn’t possible.
Shivering, I lean closer. Exhale. Lucan’s mouth brushes mine, soft, lingering…coaxing. I’ve never experienced this side of Lucan, the lover. When I provided him energy during his mate mourning, he always demanded, taking me greedily. Now, everything about his kiss cajoles and persuades. The urgency is all in the finesse, and I’d be lying if I claimed I’m oblivious to his touch. In fact, he rouses a gentle desire as he dips deeper into my mouth, sharing the flavor of coffee and nascent longing on his tongue.
But he doesn’t scorch me, doesn’t make me ache and claw and beg for him to strip me down and get deep inside me.
It doesn’t matter, I tell myself. This isn’t awful or torturous. Lucan and I might save magickind from genocide. Bram will have no reason to disclaim me. And if Ice has been lying, I’ll prevent him from using me for vengeance…and breaking my heart.
I ease from the kiss, eyes closed, and bow my head. “Speak the words, and I will Bind to you.”
And break my own heart. For as pleasant as the kiss was, I know I’ll never love Lucan. And he’ll never love me.
“You’ve been through a lot. I’ll give you a bit more time,” Lucan murmurs. “Tomorrow?”
So bloody soon? Yet I know we have no time to spare. Mathias will succeed with his nefarious plan if Bram doesn’t reach the others of the Council quickly and give them a compelling reason to nominate Lucan.
“All right.”
“No!” a male roars, sharp with outrage and pain.
I turn to find Ice barreling toward me, his ground-eating steps and furious eyes both shouting possession.
“Back off,” Lucan warns, reaching for me.
Ice grabs my wrist first and drags me closer. “Fuck off.”
His touch explodes a thousand conflicting emotions inside me: need, duty, love, anger, desire, determination. They flash through me like a strobe light, fast and blinding—everything I’ve been trying to suppress, everything I need to deny myself.
Then the chilly drizzle of Sterling’s garden is gone, replaced by a bedroom housed in, of all things, a cave. A sprawling bed with mussed black sheets, sparse furniture, no windows. Utilitarian. Bleak. Cold.
Oh, god. Ice just teleported me to his bedroom.
Chapter
Thirty-One
Ice
* * *
Fury pounds through me as I stare at Sabelle, Lucan’s kiss fresh on her lips. Every breath comes in a harsh rush and exhalation, my chest working furiously.
Speak the words, and I will Bind to you. I hear Sabelle say that to Lucan over and over in my head, stabbing me in the heart with every echoed syllable.