Page 96 of She Used to Be Nice
“Wow, thank you,” Morgan said.
Avery didn’t need to talk to anyone as they took pictures, which was great, though her essay about Noah still pulsed like an electrical charge in the air, invisible but alive and quivering. Avery could only infer that the “we” Emma mentioned earlier was the rest of the bridal party. They were probably sharpening their pitchforks in some separate group chat, ready to skewer Avery.
“Hey,” Morgan said to Avery as everyone else dispersed after the photos were done. “Just checking in.”
Avery laughed. “You’re not supposed to worry about other people on your wedding day.”
“Well, this is my best friend we’re talking about. It’s different.”
Morgan spoke to Avery like she was the only person on the lawn, despite the droves of guests who were certainly waiting to be greeted. Avery let it be the permission granted to share some of what was happening.
“According to Emma, it sounds like everyone’s read the essay.”
Morgan didn’t look shocked. Her expression was more neutral than anything else, with a hint of sympathy. “How do you feel about that? Are you surprised?”
Avery shrugged. “I guess not. Especially after Noah’s public denial.”
“Such an asshole.” Morgan peered across the lawn at Ryan holding a plate of food by the seafood buffet. “Have you talked to Ryan about it yet?”
Avery chewed nervously on her lip. “I don’t know how. Or if I should.”
“I’ll leave that decision up to you. And I’ll support you no matter what.”
Morgan pulled Avery in for a hug. Avery’s eyes welled with grateful tears, because she knew Morgan was telling the truth. If it weren’t for Morgan and Charlie’s support in Colorado, Avery might never have found the strength to support herself. A crest of gratitude swelled in her chest.
“I know,” Avery said. “You’ve always supported me. All versions of me. I can’t thank you enough for it.”
Morgan smiled and took Avery’s hand. “Come on.” She nodded toward the reception venue. “Let’s go inside together.”
The reception was held in a massive glass-walled dome near the cocktail hour patio. White lamps attached to white metal rods hung from a ceiling that curved downward to enclose the guests in what looked like hundreds of white-paneled windows. The trees and flowers blooming outside in the gardens, visible through the glass from the inside, were backlit by a sunset approaching its finale below the horizon. Avery put her evening clutch down at her seat at the head table, which was covered in sprinkles of pink rose petals and small cream candles. Already the table was plated with the first salad course, a spring mix tossed with walnuts and apple slices drizzled in a balsamic vinaigrette. Avery had helped Morgan select the menu, a mix of dinner and dessert options catered from Gramercy Tavern and The Freakin’ Rican, in addition to helping design the tablescape. It was gratifying to see her positive influence woven into the evening, despite all the negativity from the bridal party.
Avery gripped the back of her chair, her eye on the door from where guests were trickling in. She watched to see when Ryan would join them. As she waited, she picked idly at her salad to give her something to do, but then a couple minutes later, just as shewas about to give up, he appeared, laughing with Viraj and holding a beer.
Ryan and Viraj walked over to Viraj’s seat at the head table, across from where Avery stood. Viraj put down his drink and fiddled with something on his phone, avoiding eye contact with Avery. But Ryan looked up.
“Hey,” he said, nodding in Avery’s direction.
Avery met his eye. She sucked in a breath. Did Viraj tell him something just now? “Hey.”
“How are you?”
Avery pursed her lips. Should she be honest? Thatwasher new thing lately.
“I’m fine,” she said. “No, sorry—it’s weird. A little. Seeing you.”
Ryan exhaled a brief chuckle. Viraj disappeared, had taken off to talk to Charlie near the dance floor as the band started warming up. Ryan and Avery were alone, as alone as you could be in a banquet hall filling up with a hundred and fifty people.
“I feel the same,” Ryan said.
They looked around, each of them waiting for the other to break the ice. It might be too early in the night for a real conversation. Ryan was likely only on his first beer. Avery, meanwhile, had been forced to acknowledge in therapy that her drinking was unhealthy, so she was doing her best to stay sober tonight, meaning this was about as loose and open as she’d get.
“It’s good to see you, too, though,” she said, out of the knee-jerk politeness that plagues you when you’re not sure what else to say. “I’m sure Charlie’s happy to have you here.”
Ryan gave a small smile, probably out of similar politeness. “Yeah, I’m glad I could make it.”
An emcee took to the mic, telling everyone to find their seats because they were about to start serving the first course.
Ryan jerked his head across the dance floor in what Avery figured was the direction of his table. “Well, I guess I should go.”
