Page 26 of Possessed By You
“That may account for this current result, but I don’t think that’s what’s going on here. We’ll need a few days until your blood tests come through to get a better understanding of what is causing this. I’m prescribing you the supplements and nausea medication because we don’t want to be concerned about vomiting.”
“Is it possible to have anemia and still have a healthy baby?”
“It is possible. All of these measures we’re taking are precautions. Necessary precautions, because even if you weren’t pregnant, this cell count is not normal. If it is an infection or a chronic disease that is causing your cells to lower, then you will be undergoing a high-risk pregnancy. As of now, this is high-risk. I think you’re entitled to know the truth and the risks…as hard as they are to hear.”
I take the papers from her hesitantly and clutch them in my grasp.
“We are going to do this together, Darcy,” she says with a smile. “We will get this handled. You do your part, and I’ll do mine, okay? Having a child is one of the greatest joys in life. I am determined to make sure that happens.”
My world is spinning. Her positivity is lost on me. “Am I good to go?”
“Yes, my assistant will schedule your next appointment, which will be in a few weeks if there are no problems with the test results.”
“Okay, thank you.” I walk for the door, hearing my own labored gasps.
“Call me if you have any questions, any concerns, Darcy. Don’t hesitate.”
I escape into the bland white hallway like my life depends on it.
***
My palm hovers over the sink, a copulation of pills directly in the middle. I’m holding a glass of water with the other, staring into space, trying to recover from whiplash.
Whiplash hearing that Benjamin and I are expecting.
Whiplash hearing that my body is rejecting the pregnancy.
Whiplash hearing that my baby is in danger.
This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. Benjamin and I were supposed to have time, time to come to an understanding. He was supposed to want this.
I stuff the pills into my mouth and swallow them with a gulp of water. My emails are gathering quickly on my computer screen, and the office is bustling outside my door. I’ve been sitting here on company time for more than an hour, unable to move a muscle.
My phone vibrates on my desk, and Benjamin’s name appears, a photo from our wedding taking up the space around his name. I want to cry, but doing so will unravel me, and I need to remain clear. I need to absorb this and act.
Cindy appears at the door. “Darcy, do you have those manuscripts yet?”
Glad I worked late last night, I pull them out of the drawer and hold them out to her.
She tucks them under her arm and turns, then stops in the doorway and turns on her heels. “Are you okay? You’re really pale.”
My mouth won’t open, and I can’t meet her eyes.
“Darcy? Are you okay?”
“No,” I whisper.
“What happened?”
“I’m pregnant.”
Her eyes widening, she shuts the door and approaches my desk. “How far along?”
“Two months.”
“And you’re not happy about this? You’re newly married. It’s soon, yeah, but not unheard of.”
“It’s a high-risk pregnancy.”
