CHAPTER 5
TRADING UP
Lottie
Things did not go well after Mo was a supreme asshole.
If I wanted to look on the Brightside (which I didnot), him making it plain how fuckable he thought I was, was not a bad thing.
Himcompletelymissing the pass I was throwing at himwas.
I mean, did hehonestlythink I was wearing my nightie making breakfast with a man I hadn’t slept with just so I could be a huge-asstease?
No!
I wanted the big lug to ask me out.
Jerk.
Asshole.
Fuckface.
Obviously, considering I was an adult, I realized a route to rectifying this situation was to explain where I was at, and considering he thought I was fuckable, he’d probably get with the program.
Fat chance ofthat.
I couldn’t be an adult at the best of times, even actuallybeingan adult.
Sure. I got to work on time.
I paid my bills.
I kept my house.
I got oil changes when I was supposed to (though I thought that was a huge scam, every three months?come on).
What I did not do, for three days, was talk to Mo.
Yeah.
Not very adult.
Okay, that wasn’t exactly true.
We talked because I was my mother’s daughter. I couldn’t start my day with someone in my house silently trailing me and not offer him coffee.
So I’d said, “Coffee?” to him the next two mornings after he’d been a consummate jackass.
Other than that…
No.
Why?
Two reasons.
One, I was the kind of woman who held a grudge. I just did. I knew that wasn’t right. It had cost me friendships and boyfriends and maybe I should work on that.