Page 136 of Duty and Desire
“I don’t have a problem with it,” I pointed out the obvious.
“First place you go, first question you ask, is if someone has issues.”
It wasn’tthe first.
But I saw his point.
“That’s so I can ascertain if they have issues so I won’t waste time or emotion on someone who’s an asshole.”
He looked dubious. “You sure?”
“Mo, honey,” I said quietly, “can you imagine the shit I’ve come up against because of my job?”
The dubiousness fled, understanding replaced it, and he nodded. “I can.”
We were on rocky ground here and I didn’t want to be on rocky ground.
Not now.
Not when the wait was finally over and we were getting to the good stuff.
But maybe it was good to at least start the discussion, so it didn’t get buried under all the goodness. Both of us trying to ignore it was there. Then it became harder to bring it up, but it was between us and needed to be dealt with, and since we didn’t deal with it, it grew out of control and became a problem.
This was a very adult thought.
I still didn’t want to broach it and this demonstrated why I wasn’t a big fan of being an adult.
But Iwasa big fan of Mo’s, so I had to be an adult.
Damn it.
“And we need to—” I began.
“Babe, I don’t like you stripping,” he announced.
Shit.
Fortunately, Mo wasn’t done.
“But I also wouldn’t like you being a journalist based in Syria. My job isn’t often dangerous, but it is far from always safe. If you had a problem with it, we’d talk about it, but it would definitely drive a wedge if you put your foot down about it. It isn’t what it is. It’s who I am and if you asked me to stop doing it, it’d be you asking me to stop being who I am. I’ll eventually have to get out of the field because this kind of job has a shelf life and I won’t be as strong and quick as I need to be. What you do isn’t the same, but it is in some regards. I like you and I’ve had enough experience with women to know I won’t like every single thing about you. But the same goes for knowing that what I like, I likea lot so I’m willing to work at it and find ways to compromise with the rest.”
Okay, that right there wasn’t a little bit.
It was a huge truckload.
“I see you’ve been thinking about this,” I noted.
“On the ride back to you. I knew if I started things with us, I had to be all in.” He pulled me closer. “I’m all in, Lottie.”
Yeah.
That was a huge truckload.
He gave me that. He gave me a kiss.
And when he pulled away, I whispered, “Thanks, Mo.”
That was when he gave me a smile and pulled fully away, exiting the bed.
