Page 110 of Pretend
“D-Daegan?” I stutter, and I feel like I’m going to pass out. The aftermath of the drinks is getting to me. “What are you doing here? Please leave me alone! I don’t w-want to s-see you.” I turn around weakly, walking away fast, but my legs don’t reciprocate—they’re slow and heavy.
“Is my little Valentine drunk?” He coos behind me like he was the one responsible. Like he knows the answer to his own question.
Blackness starts to cloud my vision, and with every step I take, I feel like I’m sinking into quicksand.
“You think the deal you made with me was voided? The rules still apply. You are mine untilI say this is over, not ink on orders, and definitely not the Admiral.” Daegan’s manic voice is trickled with desperation. His palm silences my scream when I realize this is a side of Daegan I don’t recognize. Turmoil implodes the air, and I can’t breathe.
“Daegan, please stop! Get away from me!” I claw at his hand that covers and muffles my mouth, and he laughs like he’s enjoying everything. He grabs me by my stomach and waist, and I do everything I can to stop him. I slap at his chest and arms repeatedly, over and over againas I try to walk into the rain outside, but he’s too strong. My vision blurs, dizziness possesses everything inside me, and I’m gone into darkness.
“Daegan, please don’t do this.”
“You should have thought about that before you made a deal with the boogeyman, little valentine. Goodnight.” He presses his lips to my cheek, and I succumb to darkness.
My head is pounding,and my throat is dry. I’m awake, I know that much, but the bed I’m sleeping in…it’s not mine. The sound of someone playing on a piano—it’s a beautiful, serene, sad tune.
The sound of thunder chimes outside, joining in on the somber music, and I feel like I’m still dreaming.
I claw at the bed sheets, pushing myself out, and groan softly.
The piano keeps going.
“The day I came back home, after my time in the hospital, after multiple surgeries to reconstruct my hand and my vision…”
Daegan’s voice can be heard in the dark corner of his room. A lamp illuminates the music sheet. He sits there with his shirt and mask off, and a dragon stares back at me in an ominous way. I see the back of his head, and his messy dark hair waves are longer than before—scars all over his back, like slices.
I readjust myself on the bed as the memories of me at El Devine with Kane, his girlfriend, and Jack resurfaces. And the last thing I remember is my world spinning.
“How did I get here?” I rub the side of my head and blink to escape the grogginess.
Daegan starts to play the piano more aggressively.
“After all that physical pain and suffering, I was excited to come home. My wife hadn’t visited me once in the hospital. She said she was working…when in reality, she had been fucking her co-worker while I was deployed. And when I came back home, maskless…” Daegan stops playing the piano and palms the keys. His back muscles sway underneath his tattoos and scars, clearly full of tension as he remembers the past. Lightning flashes through the windows once more.
“She took one look at my face and cringed. She didn’t want anything to do with me. She told me she couldn’t love a man that looked like a monster.” He scoffs out with a laugh and turns around to face me. He’s smiling, but his eyes arewatering. His abs flex in the dark with his fast breathing. “She used my injuries, my time away from home,my traumato justify her cheating.”
I sit up, and my heart sinks. How could she do that to him? And where is this going?
Still, I need to get the fuck out of here.
“That happens a lot, you know? When some of us get wounded in action, our spouses can’t handle it, and they leave. She couldn’t handle my physical scars, let alone the ones stained into my soul. The nightmares…my face.”
I look around and find his door, but Daegan catches my gaze and stands from his piano. Each step was a vivid warning for me not to try it. He walks toward me, his vision pinned on me, and it scares me.
“After she cheated on me and couldn’t get used to the new makeover the Surgeon gave me, I ended it.” He kneels in front of me, and the unknown of how I passed out at El Devine scares me.
I don’t trust him.
He reaches for me, and tears start to fall out my eyes. He pushes the hair out of my face, and I tear myself away from his beautiful face. If I look at him, I’ll fall apart. I need to stay strong. He caresses the side of my face with his large palm, soothing me.
“When you saw my scars, you didn’t flinch or run away from me, and you didn’t pity me. You’re the first person who doesn’t judge me by my appearance or how I am when everyone else has labeled me as a Creature who doesn’t talk or act normal. I can be Daegan Hannibal with you, and you don’t run away from me. Instead, you welcome me, even if I may be terrifying to others.”
I chew the inside of my mouth as I listen to him. This can’t be easy when you’re repeatedly shunned by people who judge you with a closed-minded thought process.
“You see…in the state of North Carolina, it takes one year for any divorce to be finalized. I’m just a few weeks from my court date, and I’ll legally be single.”
I turn away from his headboard and lock eyes with him, searching for any hesitation.
Is he telling the truth?
