Page 44 of See You Soon
Paul was everything to me. The only man in my life I could ever depend on. He helped take care of my mother and myself. He helped me get through so much drama in high school and my early years of college. He protected me from Shane when I didn't have the strength to walk away. My brother was my best friend. He was a part of me and ever since he died,a part of me died.
I've questioned God over and over again. Why Paul? Why my big brother? And He has yet to deliver an answer to me. All my life I've been living by His commandments but lately, I've only been returned with bad luck. I was trembling with anger and confusion as I ran up the stairs to get to my room. I decided to use the stairs and avoid the elevator, which was jam-packed with soldiers trying to make it on time to PT. They usually do some form of physical training before having to go to work.
What did Kane mean by Paul's death was Danny's fault?
I deserve to know. What were they talking about? My brother died while he was on a mission. He was shot multiple times and died before they could get him to the hospital. Those were all the details that were expressed to my mother and I.
My mind travels back to that day when we found out about my brother's passing.
Two uniformed men knocked on our door. My mother opened the door so routinely as she always does. She was expecting our neighbor to come over that day. They wanted to borrow some of her gardening tools so she didn't think twice about it.
When she saw the men, their eyes full of sorrow, she knew. She knew why they were there and she screamed before they even said a word. My heart dropped and I rushed from my bedroom in the middle of studying, dropping my pencil, thinking she had hurt herself. My heart dropped, my heart already broken and scared just hearing those sounds come from my mother's mouth.
Then I saw my mother crying on the floor clutching her chest. She kept repeating,
"Not my Paul. Not my baby." Over and over again. I stood there at the door, breaking in a million pieces watching the uniformed men try and console my mother on the floor of our entryway.
“You have the wrong house, please leave! Salte! Por favor salte de mi casa! Mi hijo, donde esta mi hijo?” She screamed at them with uncontrollable sobs.
Leave! Please leave my house! My son, where’s my son?
And I knew what just happened. My best friend had died.
"For having little legs you sure do walk fast." Danny's deep voice interrupts my horrid memory, suppressing the lump in my throat. I jump not expecting to hear him so close to me. I was a few doors down from my room and we were both standing in the hallway. I turn around to face him. I’m met with a smirk and his blue eyes looking down at me.
"What? How'd you kn—?"
"Lori told me where you live."
Dammit, Lori.
My eyes narrow at him. I deserve an explanation and he better be ready to tell it. My heart thumps out of my chest. Heat rushes to my core. I hate that every time I look at him I think about his rough textured hands on my body caressing my breasts. He's stunning as hell.
God definitely took his time making him. But the more I get to know him, he isn't a man of God. Scratch that, the devil took his time creating this sinfully handsome man. His black shirt wraps around his muscles, hugging them so well. I feel so tiny around a six-foot-six muscular monster towering over me. Maybe it's a good thing our encounter in the hospital room didn't go any further, this man could destroy me with just his hands.
"Ari." Danny begins but I stop him before he can go on further, my blood boiling.
"We can talk in my room." I snap before turning around, getting closer to my door knob. There are soldiers all around us, rushing to work. I feel Danny's eyes behind me, hearing his footsteps follow me and I swallow, nervously. I hate being around him so close, my head grows fuzzy and I can't think straight.
"Look Ari, this isn't something I want to revisit. It's hard for me because I’m not allowed to say anything.” He did not just imply that this is hard for him. I feel like time stops. The old me would have bitten her tongue. And not say what I was truly thinking. I would be too occupied and concerned with howhe's going to feelonce I open my mouth. This time I didn’t care. He's going to hear me.
"It's hard foryou?" I hiss. My eyebrows furrowed and I'm on my tiptoes making damn sure he can hear me clearly up there, in the clouds. He's a mountain and I'm a small hill.
He stares at me hard and emotionless. His blue eyes stare straight into my soul and I can see that he's in pain. His stare intimidates me so much I feel like I'm going to break in half so… I look away at my feet.
Staring at my shoes, I let out a deep breath, trying to calm down. He infuriates me so much. We stand there in silence, without meeting each other's gaze again.
"Ari."
"What?" I snap.
"Did you lock your door when you left because it's open?"
"What are you talking about?" I look at my door and it's cracked open. I stare at it confused.
Why can't I just sleep? Why does tonight have to be one of the most eventful nights of my life? I've worked twelve hours and all I want to do is strip into my pajamas, go underneath my covers, and drift into a deep sleep... with Danny's arms as my pillow.
"I always lock my door before I go anywhere," I mutter softly.
