Page 81 of The Scoundrel and the Debutante
“But you didn’t tell him why, Aurora, and he is a clever young man, as you know.”
She sighed and looked down at her lap.
“I understand the desire to experience life before you marry,” he said. “But the Villeroy fellow doesn’t seem the type—”
“I know, Iknow,” she said. “But he was so earnest in his esteem, and in the past few weeks, I began to believe that I really did love him,” she said. “I don’t expect you to understand it, but I know what I felt, and I felt love for him. And yet, when I saw you, I was overcome with...relief.I realized I wouldn’t have to go through with it. I realized I could go home and I almost wept with joy.”
Roan thought of Prudence and wondered...had she been overcome with relief when she’d seen her family? Had she made her impassioned plea for his sake, as Aurora had done in Oxford for Villeroy? No, no, he would know if Prudence’s feelings were as frivolous as his sister’s feelings. He would know if she’d felt relief at seeing her family.
Aurora sighed and rested her head against his shoulder. “I suppose I’ve ruined everything.”
“With Gunderson?” he asked, and shifted her so that he could put his arm around her. “Probably so.”
She sighed again. “Do you know the strangest thing? I miss him.”
“You have a questionable way of demonstrating that.”
“Oh, I know I’ve made a mess. I’m so ashamed.”
“Then why did you do it?” he asked helplessly, unable to understand how her head worked.
She sniffed, wiped her gloved fingers beneath her eyes. “Don’t scold me anymore. I know how awful I’ve been.”
“Very,” he agreed.
She whimpered. “At least I haven’t ruined everything,” she said petulantly.
“What do you mean?”
Aurora blinked up at him. “I mean that at leastyourengagement is still intact. You would never go back on your word, not like me. I’m awful, Roan! I realize now how irresponsible and unfeeling I’ve been. Father will never forgive me.”
Roan gave her a pat on her shoulder. “He’ll forgive you. He always does. Funny that he’s never been so quick to forgive me.”
“You! You’ve never done anything to displease him. And besides, you’re a man. Men can do whatever they please.”
“That is not entirely true,” he said. “I may have more freedom than you, but I still have a responsibility to our family.” He was painfully aware that Aurora was right; he always honored his word. What was a man without his word, really?
But wasn’t there some honor to following his heart, too? To keep his word now...well, the stakes felt too high. He could no more imagine himself with Susannah Pratt by his side for the rest of his life than he could imagine himself singing and dancing on a stage. It was impossible. Especially now, especially now that he knew what love was.
“Perhaps,” Aurora said. “But at least when you marry Susannah Pratt, you may continue to do as you please. When I marry Sam Gunderson—ifI marry Sam, I’ll have to do as he wants.”
Roan didn’t say anything to that.
“Where are we going?” Aurora asked. “Do we sail tonight? I should like the chance to say goodbye to my friends.”
“I am hardly inclined to allow a social swath through London after what you’ve done,” he said gruffly. “Tonight, we will be the guests of Mr. and Mrs. Easton. We’ll see about your farewells tomorrow.”
“Easton,” she repeated. “Who are they, friends of Auntie Mary?”
“Of mine,” Roan said. He didn’t say more than that, not trusting himself to speak about Prudence without a torrent of emotion spilling out. He wasn’t ready to tell Aurora what had happened to him here. He needed to think how to broach it. Everything had happened so fast that he hadn’t yet considered how, exactly, he would break the news to his family.
“Of yours?” She looked at him curiously. “How do youknow anyone in London? Have you been here long?”
“A few days,” he said.
Aurora cocked her head. “There is something you’re not telling me, Roan.”
He couldn’t very well hide it, so Roan told Aurora about Prudence. About the coach, the trip across the English countryside. About falling in love.
