Page 80 of Caught in a Bad Fauxmance
“Add it to the never-ending list of stupid things I’ve done over the past month. If you want to touch the poison flag and break out into a rash, then be my guest.”
Now that he’s out of harm’s way, I roll off him. He doesn’t move, still splayed out on the ground.
“We can win without cheating,” I say, more to myself than him. “You should try it sometime.”
Finding the others will take time, and I’ll need to come up with a gentle way to explain that I completely bombed the plan I’d been so intent on, so I take off in the direction I came. I’ve barely made it two feet when Julian’s hand closes around my wrist.
“What is it with you and grabbing my wrist?” I snap.
“Thank you,” he says at the same time, the soft cadence of his voice lost beneath the harshness of mine.
I hold my wrist to my chest, running my fingers along the tender skin until the warmth of his touch begins to fade. If we were still…whatever we were before, I’d say something cute like “That’s what fake boyfriends are for.” I’m not sure what I can say to him anymore.
“You’re welcome.” A civil response. Maybe that’s all we can be now. Civil.
Because I’m weak, I give him a chance. I stay in place, arms crossed, waiting for him to tell me whatever it is he needs to say so badly. But he just stares at me. For a brief second, I wonder if he’s going to kiss me. For an even briefer second, Ihopehe’s going to kiss me. That’s a dangerous line of thought, so I decide he’s had enough time, and like I told him three weeks ago, I don’t owe him anything.
“I told my dad,” he calls out when I start walking away.
This is probably a trap, I tell myself. But that doesn’t stop me from freezing. I don’t turn around, scanning the perimeter for any of his siblings waiting to launch a sneak attack.
“Told him what?” I reply once I’m sure the coast is clear.
“Everything.” His voice is closer, close enough that I can feel the words on the back of my neck. When I turn, he’sthere, too close and too earnest, but I don’t run. “About Princeton, about what really happened with Liam.”
I don’t know if I should believe him, let alone how to respond. Logic says that this is part of his plan. Just because I figured out what he was up to doesn’t mean he can’t still see it through.
“How did he take it?” Neutral ground. My guard staysup.
“Better than I thought.” He shrugs, the simple movement a startling reminder of how oddly close we are. It wouldn’t take much to close the distance, just a tiny bit of courage. “Mom called him beforehand, after I told her I wanted to come clean. They talked for over an hour, and whatever she said made him willing to listen, for once.”
This is the point where I should go. I’ve heard what he had to say, and while I’m glad he gets to live his truth, it doesn’t change ours.
“I’m sorry,” he says before I can decide either way. “For lying to you, for dragging you into this. And especially for hurting you. You don’t have to forgive me, or ever talk to me again, but I couldn’t let you leave without telling you that you’re the most wonderful thing to happen to me in a really long time. And I’m sorry that I made you think you were anything less than that.”
He says it so quickly it leaves him breathless. There are plenty of questions I could ask, routes I could take, and yet only one comes to mind.
“Did you tell him about us?” I ask, less than a whisper.
The question makes him smile, something that shouldn’t still make my heart race. “Just the truth—that at first we wereonly pretending to be together because of Liam.” I don’t realize his hand is in mine until he’s running his thumb along my knuckles. Did he reach out, or did I?
“Why not tell him the whole story?”
“Because the rest of it was real. And that part’s just forus.”
A thousand words sit on the tip of my tongue, but Julian has said the only ones that matter.
We meet halfway, his hand on my waist and my fingers in his hair. We kiss slow and fast, light and heavy, for every time I thought of him, but he wasn’t there. Forgiveness, longing, apologies, written and whispered in the brush of our lips and tips of our fingers. When we open our eyes, it could all be over. He could knock me over and hold me down until his siblings secure the win. He could still stab me in the back like he’d planned to. For now, I hold him tight wherever I can, his shirt, his hair, nipping his lower lip with my teeth. I’m not ready to let him go yet.
Henry comes out of the woodwork, running over to Julian as quickly as he can. “Someone’s coming,” he announces, looking warily over his shoulder.
“Let’s go, Romeo,” Stella hisses, appearing from behind a nearby tree.
My stomach plummets as we pull apart. This is it, whatever they had planned. Julian senses my apprehension, tightening his grip around my waist. He’s too strong for me to yank free, so he has me exactly where he wants me.
“Devin!” Maya calls out, followed by the sound of footsteps. I’m so glad she remembered my warning to come find me if I didn’t make it back to base within fifteen minutes.
“Maya!” I shout back, hoping she’ll know how to follow my voice.
