Page 61 of Glass and Bone
At some point I end up in the bed, changed into a black, silk nightdress. I don’t remember changing out of my coronation dress or climbing into bed, but here I lay with damp hair. It seems I may have taken a bath at some point, but even that isn’t something I remember. I sigh as I blame the copious amount of wine I consumed earlier in the night.
I am unable to fall back asleep as I sit here in bed. It's far too large, and I can’t get the thought of Evreux’s dead body lying in it just a day prior. My thoughts wander as I think about Jeremiah and Tobias. I know I can make him believe me; I just need him to listen. I can’t imagine what thoughts are flowing through his head right now. So much has happened in such little time.
I know he didn’t mean to hurt me, or at least that he feels remorse that he did, but I can’t help but hope that side of him fades. I sit up and reach for the wine glass I must have refilled on the side table, taking a sip of the warm, syrupy liquid. I hate that I find such comfort in alcohol, but this wine is all I crave when I want to relax. I stand and walk over to the fireplace. It’s warmth cascading over me as I take a deep breath.
Green eyes infiltrate my thoughts as I remember that man. I have seen him multiple times, both in my dreams and in reality. He is familiar, comforting, but I don’t know who he is. Maybe he is a figment of my imagination, and I am growing mad, or he is real and is stalking me. I need to know who he is, what he wants from me. His eyes remind me so much of Chatis, which makes me think of home. The trees and ever-present fog.
I wonder what my father is doing? If he even cares about my absence or what happened to me. Does he know the king is dead and I have been wed and crowned within the last day? Has he already found a new woman to marry and conceive a child with? Does he trust me to follow through with what I was born to do? I shake my head and step away from the fire.
The door opens and Tobias stumbles in with a glass in hand. He gives me a toothy grin as he falls against the wall. Erik is right outside the door, and he gives me a look of pity as he closes it.
“Hello, wife.” Tobias murmurs as he tries to make his way towards me, amber liquid sloshing out of the glass and onto the floor. I set my glass down just as he stumbles into me. “You smell so good. Like roses and jasmine.” He slurs, pressing his nose into my hair. He smells like alcohol and sweat mixed with his normal cedar and smoke, but there is something else there. Something metallic and tangy. I wrap my arm around his waist and guide him to the bed. “Where are we going?” He drops the cup, and it splashes onto the ground, bouncing off the rug.
“I’m taking you to bed.” I grunt as I pull him towards the bed.
“Oh, okay.” He smiles as I push him into the mattress. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me down with him.
“Tobias, let go.” I snap and pull out of his embrace. He lets go with a sigh, his arms plopping down next to him.
“Lay with me.” He whines and I roll my eyes. Who knew drunk kings could be such babies?
“Get some sleep, you have had far too much to drink.”
“I’m so sorry, Ela.” He slurs, his eyes saddened. “I am scared.”
“What are you scared of Tobias?” I try to tone back the irritation, but my words come out in a breathy snarl.
“That you’ll leave me.”
“I’m not going anywhere that you aren’t forcing me to go.” He ponders what I said with his drunken brain.
“I think I love you.” He whispers. My face falls and I sigh.
“Then love me. Stop hurting me. Believeme.”
“I don’t want to hurt you, my love.” He reaches forward and lightly touches my cheek. “I’m sorry.” I can see the tears welling up in his eyes and I feel pity.
“I know you don’t.”
“I believe you.” His voice is quiet as if he’s falling asleep saying the words. “I can’t do anything without proof, Elaenor. I can’t.” I hold his hand against my cheek as his eyes close.
“We can talk about this tomorrow.” He nods softly as he almost immediately starts snoring. His white shirt has small splatters of something dark along his chest, maybe red wine? His knuckles are bruised and scraped up, he must have tripped or fallen or gotten into a drunken brawl. I roll my eyes and turn away from him.
I step down from the bed and turn towards the room. My eyes fall onto the writing desk, and I once again think of my father. Sitting down, I grab a quill and paper and begin writing.
Father,
My time here in Noterra has been a whirlwind of events that have led me
to be wed and crowned queen all within a day. Noterra is much
different compared to Chatis, and I only hope I grow comfortable here.
I am hopeful an heir will be provided soon so that our countries rest easy knowing there is a line of succession in place.
As King Evreux took his last breath, he spoke to me regarding my mother.
You have never been forthcoming about her, nor did I seek out his words,
