Page 5 of Running Scared
They’d have to talk this time, right?This couldn’t be a relationship already, could it?They needed to discuss what they were doing, how this was happening, what sort of affair this was, didn’t they?
People didn’t just have sex whenever one person was in town, right?
Right?
A Royal Meeting of the Minds
Laure:Okay, guys, sibling text meeting.
Val:Why am I here?
Sal:Because you need to stop having sex with your new boyfriend.You’ll dehydrate, princess.Don’t you know how to pace yourself?
Val:Well, it’s not like I’ve been training for sex like it was an Olympic event likesomepeople.Laure, why isn’t Dean on this thread?
Reg:Omg is he dead?
Val, Sal, Laure, and Prock:NO!
Laure:Omg, what has so traumatized you that your go-to for a meeting is that somebody has to bedead?
Chance:You guys, he worries.Be nice.
Laure:Sorry, sweetie—it throws us off our game, that’s all.I just wanted to ask everybody if they knew who Dean was seeing.
Sal:As far as I know, he’s still having a passionate affair with the stick up his ass.
Prock:Didn’t you name it once?Back when Dean was in the academy?
Sal:Phil.I called it Phil because it was apparently the only thing that could ever Phil Dean with joy.
Reg:Ouch.
Chance:Wait, isn’t that Fill?
Sal:Oh God, Sunshine, I just cannot with you!Somebody pinch his little cheeks!
Prock:He’s at Mom’s house for summer vacation.When we’re done here, I’ll have Mom do it.
Sal:Prock, your only shortcoming as a brother is that you never dumped ants on Dean when he was a kid.
Prock:You keep saying that.Why didn’tyoudo it?
Sal:Because a five-year age difference made me too old to do it, but you were only two and a half years older, so you were fine.
Prock:Didn’t feel right.What can I say?Dean would have been hurt, but what’s worse, he wouldn’t have said a word, and then we’d feelworse,and then he’d win.The only way to win with Dean is not to play.
Reg:Chance, I get the feeling we werereally luckyto be the youngest two.The top five apparently had to survive the Hunger Games to get to adulthood.
Chance:I didn’t read those books.Will I get that reference if I watch the movies instead?
Laure:Seriously, Chance, you need to hang out with Russell and Shaw more often.My kids know their movies.
Reg:I feel like college was wasted on him.
Prock:People!Can we focus here?Laure had a question!
Reg:I think it’s perfectly clear that we have no idea who Dean is seeing.Why are we having a sibling meeting about this again?
