Page 87 of The Summer Arrangement
“Of course, I do. What’s your point?”
His brows rise to his hair line. “Do you hear yourself?”
“Grrrr…” I growl. “What’s your point, Jax?”
“Elizabeth, you’re one of the smartest people I know.” He shakes his head and has the audacity to laugh. I seriously might rip his arms off his chest and beat him with them. “You literally just said it. Why isn’t it sinking in?”
“What are you talking about, Jax Cartwright? My patience is thin and unless you wantmy crazyunleashing on you… spit it out!”
“Elizabeth Renee Lancaster… I love you like a sister, but you’re gonna be the death of me. You. Love. Them. Plain and simple. Nothing else should matter. Yes, you just went through an extremely traumatic experience, so of course you’re scared. But focus on what you just said. You. Love. Them.” He punctuates each word as if he wants to slap me across the face with them.
Replaying his words, I repeat, “I. Love. Them.”
“Don’t you?”
“Yes, but that doesn’t mean I should be with them.”
Jax’s arms flail out between us. “Why the fuck not?”
“So much could go wrong. What if I’m not ready?”
“Liz, you could walk across the street and get hit by a bus tomorrow. Nothing is guaranteed. The bigger question you need to ask yourself is can you handlenot being with them?Can you seriously say you’d be okay if he moved on? Our paths are bound to cross; will you be okay watching him be in love with someone else?”
“He… he hasn’t said he loved me,” I quickly point out.
“Oh, you didn’t ride with him for two hours this morning. He was equally worried aboutyou and his daughter. Trust me. That man loves you just as much as you love him. I’d bet my best guitar on it.”
Jumping to my feet, it hits me like a bolt of lightning. “I… I need to see him.”
“Maybe take a minute and shower first. No offense, but your eyes are puffy, and you’re a bit ripe at the moment.”
Just as I get out of the shower, I receive a text.
Cameron: Good news! Milli’s doing better than expected, and they’re releasing us in a few hours. Instead of coming back here, meet us at the house?
Me: That’s great news. I’ll see you there.
Thinking of the state I left his house, I pick up my pace. There isn’t a bed that’s ready for Milli or Cameron for that matter. I’m sure they must be exhausted. I washed all the blankets while taking care of Milli yesterday but never got around to making any beds.
As I rush downstairs, I find Lanie in the kitchen. “Great news, Milli’s being discharged this afternoon. I’m going to head over to their house and make it so they’ll have beds to sleep in.”
“Liz, you’re exhausted. Have you even slept?”
“A little at the hospital this morning,” I admit.
“Here,” she says, grabbing her purse. “I’ll head over there and help you. Who knows how long they’ll take, but I don’t want you running yourself ragged.”
I’m seriously dead on my feet, and only the thought of finally telling Cameron how I feel is what’s getting me through this.
“Sure. Wanna take your car since I have Cam’s?”
“How about I drive? I’m well rested, and you’re clearly running on fumes. I’ll walk back or get Ryan to pick me up…Oh, don’t give me that look. I’m not negotiating with you. I’m driving.”
Rushing to her, I hug her fiercely. “I love you, Lanie. You’re the best.”
My sister lives up to her word. She and I make quick work at getting Cameron’s place ready for their return. We make all the beds, she does the dishes, and I put another load of laundry in the wash. She even has the forethought to order takeout for us before heading back home.
With nothing left to do, I sit on the couch to wait for them.
