Page 114 of Little Children
Again, her team offered no reaction to his words, but she was sure they were all eager for an answer.
‘You want the truth, I’ll give it to you – all of it,’ she said, and she didn’t just mean Ashworth. ‘I fucked up. I saw myself in that kid, and I believed every word that came out of her mouth. I believed that the man had gone to her room almost every night and forced her to do unspeakable things. I fell for the fear and terror I saw in her eyes. I recoiled in horror at the things she described and believed every tear that fell from her reddened eyes. I knew the only way to stop him from doing it to other kids was to get him to confess, so I made his life hell. I badgered him and I harassed him until he couldn’t take it any more. And there’s nothing I wouldn’t give to go back and change what I did. Not one day goes by that I don’t think about Amber Rose. When her story began to change after his death, I knew I’d been deceived in the worst possible way and that I, not Amber, was responsible for that man’s death.’
She paused. No one said a word, which was good because she wasn’t finished yet.
‘And because I can’t take it back and undo it, I remember it, I relive it. I use it to question everything. I use it to make sure I’m the best copper I can be. If you think I’ll ever forgive myself for my actions, you haven’t learned a damn thing about me. If you go public with it, I’ll say exactly what I’ve just said. I won’t hide and I won’t lie, but most likely I will be forced to resign. So you should know that you’re not ridding the force of a bent copper, but removing someone who made a mistake once and who works doubly hard to make up for it now.’
‘It’s true,’ Bryant offered.
‘She does,’ Penn said.
‘Bang on,’ Stacey added.
Ashworth looked over all four of them. He held up his hands. ‘Erm. I wasn’t expecting…’
‘Now, I’ve got a question for you, Steve,’ Kim continued. ‘You think you’re any good at this reporting shit?’
‘Of course. I just keep?—’
‘Only you’ve had two months, and this is the best you’ve got, which means you’re either a shit investigator or I’ve got nothing more to hide. Which is it? Because both things can’t be true.’ She paused. ‘Thing is, Steve, I’ve done my research too, and I don’t think you’re just a nuisance. You’ve done some good stuff. You’ve done some shit stuff too, but I know you honestly felt I was a corrupt copper.’
‘I did,’ he answered.
‘Then crack on, my man, cos you will find nothing else,’ she said and meant it. ‘If, however, you are actually interested in digging into a story that could save lives, feel free to follow us again right now, one more time. Your call on whether you want the opportunity to make a difference.’
She strode towards the car with no idea what the man was going to do.
Seventy-Five
By the time they were nearing Burnley, Red had called to say they were right behind and there was a car between them.
She enlightened him about the reporter, and he told her that he’d been unable to get anywhere near the chief. She was working hard to delay the announcement about Roy and getting prepared for when the news broke.
Right now, there was no formal operation and the eight of them were on their own.
Kim felt her excitement start to grow as the satnav said they were only a couple of miles away from the postcode Penn had tracked down.
Most of the forty-mile journey to Burnley had been spent in silence as Bryant had focussed on the driving. Motorways had taken them around both Preston and Blackburn, and they were now on the other side of Burnley, driving in the dark.
The roads had become narrower, with hedges on both sides, giving Bryant no visibility. Both Stacey and Penn were operating Google Maps, giving them daytime views of the area.
‘Just approaching the postcode area now,’ Penn offered.
‘Stace?’ Kim asked.
‘Nothing yet.’
Kim knew that postcodes covered around twelve properties, but out here that could stretch for miles. It had been almost a mile since they’d passed any kind of building.
‘Slow it,’ Stacey said. ‘There’s something coming up on the left.’
Bryant slowed to ten miles per hour.
‘Nope, it’s just a farmhouse,’ Stacey said. ‘Keep going.’
Bryant picked up speed but not by much.
There was a feeling in the car that they were getting close.
