Page 48 of Wham Line
A long second ticked past.And then another.
“I’m going to check on him,” I said.
They moved aside so that I could get to the stairs.
“It was nice to meet you,” Alice said as I went down.
“Nice to meet you too.”
Eric didn’t say anything, but banked anger radiated off of him.
As I made my way back to Bobby’s room, the sound of voices resumed—the clipped, suppressed hostility too low for me to make out the individual words.I tried focusing on the little decorative pieces I passed—a terracotta bottle with two-tone paint; a wood carving of a tree hanging on the wall, an ornamental bird cage.God, I hoped it was ornamental.Otherwise, we were dealing with a prison-break type situation.No dust anywhere.And the lemon scent of furniture polish.
It wasn’t any of my business, I told myself.I didn’t know them.I didn’t know their situation.And times like these wore on everybody, left raw nerves exposed, brought buried stuff to the surface.Stuff that maybe wasn’tevenstuff, not really.Imagined hurts.Old insecurities.Fears.
Caught up in my own thoughts, I didn’t register what I was hearing until I was almost at the door to Bobby’s childhood bedroom.And then I stopped.Bobby was saying something, the words indistinct.He’s on the phone, I thought.Someone called.Fox.Or Indira.Or Keme.But no, Keme would have texted unless it was an emergency, so maybe Millie—
A choked sob from the bedroom froze me.
That had been Bobby.
Bobby had made that noise.
I reached for the door handle, panic rising inside me—cold, dark waters up to my chin.
And then he said, “I’ve got to go, West.”A gap came after the name of his ex-boyfriend.And then, “Thanks.I really needed to talk to someone.”
My hand hovered above the doorknob.
From the room, nothing.
I stepped back.I wiped my hand on my joggers.
He was upset.He’d been crying.He’d want time to pull himself together.
The thoughts were like something wrapped in layers and layers of bubble wrap.
I’ll order pho, I thought as I turned toward the family room.I found my phone.My fingers felt slick against the case.The doctor said fluids.And Bobby loves pho.
Chapter 13
Later, long after Bobby had finished eating and fallen back into a deep slumber, I lay there, staring up at the ceiling.The rumble of Eric’s Land Rover told me when he and his wife finally left.Once, something moved out in the ornamental bushes—a burst of movement, the rustle of branches.Light pollution from the city filtered through the blinds, striping the carpet, the bedspread, the wall.Next to me, Bobby radiated warmth; his breathing was strong and deep.When I finally worked up the courage to look, it was hard to tell, in the dark, if he had tear tracks.
What had I done wrong?
As soon as he’d told me about his mom, I’d dropped everything.I’d come here with him.I’d insisted, as a matter of fact, because I wanted him to know I supported him.That I’d do anything for him.I’d asked him about his feelings so that he knew he was free to share them if he wanted to.But I’d also given him space.I’d sat with him and his dad and his brother.I’d been polite, or I thought I had.Had I crossed some invisible barrier and demanded too much?Had I been too needy in my own way?
Or was it something Ihadn’tdone?Should I have asked more questions?Probed?Tried to force words out of him?Should I have kissed him more?Initiated…something?Any time I’d touched Bobby, he’d pulled away.Had he wanted me to prove, somehow, that I still wanted him?That I wouldn’t be put off?I couldn’t help thinking of what had happened with Keme not too long ago.Had this all been some kind of test?If so, it seemed, I had failed.
He had called West.
He had talked to him about his feelings.
He had cried.
I squeezed my eyes shut until sparks danced against the back of my eyelids.
What made it all worse was that I couldn’t even imagine West gloating.I couldn’t imagine him getting off the phone and laughing at me, enjoying how much of a dunce I was, proud of the fact that Bobby had called him.West was too sweet.Too kind.He wouldn’t have done anything like that.He’d be home, worrying about Bobby.God, he was so sweet he was probably worrying aboutme.
