Page 47 of Chaos
Operation PFFN Super Secret Video Correspondence: #5
Screen blinks to life, revealing a haggard-looking Asher sitting at a table with Caleb.
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Asher:You ready, padre?
Caleb:I’m here, aren’t I?
Asher rolls his eyes at the camera before glancing off screen and frowning.
Asher:I’ll say one thing about priests, you know how to follow a schedule. Well, we might as well get started.*clears throat*So as I’m sure all of you are aware, the hits keep on coming. Or in this case, the wonders keep on falling.
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Pan rushes into the frame, drops a book on the table, and does a double take at Asher and Caleb.
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Pan:You two have certainly looked better. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this disheveled, Caleb. I’ve definitely seen you this rundown, brother, but usually it's for fun reasons. Have you been remembering to hydrate? Do you need me to order you a multivitamin? Our Rosie is rather insatiable now that she’s knocked up.
Caleb:You’re late.
Pan: *scoffs*Impossible. A demon arrives precisely when he means to.
Asher: The last time I checked, you weren’t a demon anymore.
Pan:More’s the pity.
Pan opens the book and thumbs through the pages.
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Asher:Are you demon enough to at least have something useful for us from that fucking book?
Pan:If you’re going to be rude, I’m going to leave. I don’t need to be here, you know. I have a pregnant mate I could be taking care of.
Caleb:So do I, demon. Can we move this along? The world is quite literally ending with every moment you waste yammering on.
Pan gets up and walks off screen.
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Asher:Where are you going?
Pan:Satisfying my curiosity.
Caleb:I told you involving him was a mistake.
Asher:We don’t have a choice. He’s the only one who can decipher the Book of Ted.
Pan: *hums*Interesting. Vampires can be caught on film. I have always wondered about that. I knew the reflection myth was only in relation to antique silver-backed mirrors, but Gavin has never let us test the film theory.
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Pan comes back into frame.
Pan:And for the record, since this is supposed to be an educational program, it’s not the Book of Ted.
